


Hollow

by Nhitori



Series: Hatoful Datefriend [1]
Category: Hatoful Kareshi | Hatoful Boyfriend
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Multi, Trans Male Character, Transphobia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-29
Updated: 2016-05-24
Packaged: 2018-05-04 01:55:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 41,589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5315906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nhitori/pseuds/Nhitori
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Are we gonna be like our parents?"<br/>"Not me.  Not ever."<br/>"It's unavoidable.  It just happens."<br/>"What does?"<br/>"When you grow up, your heart dies."</p><p>He was Isa Souma.<br/>Not Utsuro Ichijou.</p><p>Not an Ichijou at all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Don't... think too hard about the politics.

Isa Souma hated politicians.

The very idea of politicians was a ridiculous one to him; the thought that a select number of the population had the opportunity of impacting the socioeconomic direction of a city, region, or the entire country was a strange enough one from the start, but there was also the matter to consider that politics had a habit of running in the family. Once one person had staked their claim in such matters, anyone related had a tendency to be pulled in as well. It wasn’t all too dissimilar to a monarchy, except that there were more of them now.

The real issue wasn’t that there were people who had power over others when it came to laws and diplomacy, no, Souma was certain that if there was to be a “true democracy” where everyone could put their opinions out for action, it would quickly turn to pure anarchy. Rather, he disliked the fact that there was no real gateway to become a ‘politician’, and thus, no true test of competency among them. The number of idiots that got themselves on television these days was far more than the ideal. All they really needed was money. The only clever politicians were the ones who slimed their way into enough cash to buy their way into more sliminess.

He supposed that the Ichijou family was more the “slimy” sort than the “idiots with money” sort. He couldn’t deny, if asked, that he had a particularly strong disdain for that group as opposed to others. Even the idiots couldn’t quite compare. After all, for anything the idiots might say to him, they didn’t actually have any sway over his life and decisions. The Ichijou group, on the other hand…

“Utsuro, dear, won’t you take off your coat?” Speak of the devil, there was one of them now to interrupt his train of thought. Sickly-sweet voice put on as a display for the guests, she had to appear for all the world like a wonderful mother. Her hands were bony as she grabbed his shoulder, because all the botox and plastic surgery in the world still couldn’t reverse the process of aging. Isa was an only child thanks to the fact that this woman had begun menopause about three months after giving birth to him, so she was a fairly old mother.

“No,” He shook his head, looking up from his phone only to stare at her. He’d always been said to have a particularly piercing gaze, with strangely violet eyes that found no place on the countenance of either of his parents. The similarity these eyes bore to that of his uncle’s, however, had prompted a paternity test near-immediately. He was his father’s son, though. Unfortunately so. Mino Ichijou might have been a better parent.

“Now, Utsuro…” She frowned, walking around to the other side of the couch to lean down in front of him. Another thing that separated him from his parents was that the both of them were of a certain height, and he was not. The difference between them was enough that, when he was sitting, his mother’s kneeling on the floor took them to eye level, “You promised…”

“Promised what, Asuka?” He questioned. He made a habit of using his parents’ names rather than any sort of affectionate title, “I said I’d wear the dress. Never that I’d let anyone see me in it.”

“Now, Utsuro…” Her sweetness wavered slightly as she captured his hands in her own. Her skin was soft. Really soft. Too much expensive lotion, “Your father and I do so much for you. We don’t make you appear on television, we pay for your living expenses and education… the least you can do for us is be a good daughter, just sometimes.”

“Mm,” He grumbled slightly, but kept a blank look. He just wanted to make it clear he was annoyed without showing the actual level of his discomfort. Hiding the truth was something he’d become very good at over the years, “I’m at your dinner party. I turned down an interesting case to be here. Isn’t that enough for you?”

“...I suppose so. But, you’ll at least let me take a picture after the guests are gone? For Grandma,” She insisted, giving him an earnest smile. By reminding her of his accomplishments he’d managed to end the main argument, at least.

“Grandma doesn’t even recognize me anymore,” He sighed, looking away, “Just tell the truth, Asuka. You want a picture for yourself.”

“Well, Grandma might recognize you in that dress…” She frowned, letting go of his hands and standing back up, “She always said how cute you looked, when we went to see her for Christmas when you were little… Maybe if you grew your hair out again?”

“That’s not how it works,” He rolled his eyes, taking his phone back out of his pocket, “She’s absolutely senile. The last thing she remembers clearly is from before I was even born. If I went to see her now she’d probably pick up on my eyes and start calling me Mino.”

“Did I hear my favorite neph- niece, say my name?” Ah, speak of the devil again. Isa seemed to be doing that quite a bit today. At least this particular relative was… less awful, by a long shot. Maybe a bit clueless, but he covered acceptably enough.

“Assuming that favorite niece is me, then yes. You did. I was talking about how your mother would mistake me for you if I went to visit her.”

“Course it’s you. See any cousins anywhere?” He chuckled, ruffling Isa’s hair. There weren’t any cousins. Mino had never had children of his own, nor had he and Masura’s sister. Isa’s father had been the only one to continue the Ichijou line, and Isa had been the single result of that. No wonder there was so much pressure on him. Several generations of political slimeballs looked to him to continue their legacy.

What a pain.

Lots of things in Isa Souma’s life were that; a pain. Annoyances that weren’t quite major, but went beyond minor as well. Rather, they were things that were actually large problems, but that he treated only as nuisances. It was just a little bit annoying, that he had to keep on being “Utsuro Ichijou” to anyone who asked. A nuisance, that he had to play the perfect child on command. A chore, that he had to carry on the Ichijou traditions.

It was only because he wanted to get it done with that he’d been such a prodigy. With a completed legal degree by the age of eighteen, he was certainly one of the more accomplished young people in the world. When he’d first gone to law school a local paper wanted to do a report on him, but he’d refused. He wouldn’t pick up cases that were going to be publicized, though the name of Utsuro Ichijou spread anyhow. It was only after that, when he started to get some more interesting cases. Apparently he was such a good prosecutor that cases would be made private only for the opportunity that he might work on them…

It was a consolation, he supposed. He had never held a personal interest in being a lawyer, but he was urged into it. After all, many politicians started out as lawyers, and it would give him a more legitimate background than his parents when he eventually ran for some sort of office. And he would be running for some sort of office. He wouldn’t be allowed not to. He didn’t consider himself to be particularly charismatic, nor did he hold any views far enough into his party’s extremes that he would garner much support, so he probably would never win an election… but he still wouldn’t be permitted not to run, someday. When he was a bit older. A bit more suited to the job.

And, though his parents never actually said it, a bit more obedient. And… even more softly implied, but still omnipresent, more womanly. Nobody was going to go for a ‘tomboy’ for any professional position, but even then at least he’d make sense to them. As it was, he was just some sort of confused mass to Asuka and Masura Ichijou. He was successful in just the ways they wanted… but lacked the demeanor entirely. He was not the stately and dignified woman they wanted him to be, and never would. He was short, barely hygienic enough for their standards, reluctant to dress nicely. A compacted ball of silent rage, a supposedly unfounded spitefulness that showed in his behavior, his way of addressing his parents.

And in his name.

Isa Souma.

Nobody knew him by that name, nobody except for two people he’d confided in. His whole life, he’d only ever told two people. His uncle, who supported him, though he regretted telling him at times when he was nearly outed. And there was… one friend of his, he’d spoken to. Back when he still bothered to make friends. That friend had promised not to tell anybody, but was just a little bit too weirded out personally.

Isa was the only part of the name that was really necessary. A change from Utsuro to Isa, he almost found it funny. Utsuro was not a common name. A word which meant blank, empty, hollow. As if it was some sort of joke that they’d call him that. As if the Ichijou family was aware that wrapping a child up in their affairs was bound to drain their life away until they were nothing but a puppet. A doll to use as a show of their family-friendly politics, until the day that poor empty child would become just like them. Utsuro had never been a particularly feminine name… but he hated it for what it meant and what it signified, not what people might think when they heard it.

Isa.

An archaic word which could mean “I don’t know”. A word that wasn’t used anymore. A word that he could claim to mean himself. It was really not the most important part of the change, however.

Souma.

It didn’t matter to him what the name could mean. He liked the way it sounded altogether, and it was not Ichijou. He had, in essence, disowned his family, because Isa Souma was his name. Not Utsuro Ichijou. Not an Ichijou at all. Not a politician’s daughter, but his own person, away from all of that. It was at times like these that he held onto that idea. He was Isa Souma.

“Mino,” Isa was brought out of his thoughts by his mother chastising her brother-in-law, “Why don’t you go somewhere else? I’m sure some of our guests would like to speak with Utsuro, and you’re a little bit…”

Isa couldn’t help but feel bitter. Masura Ichijou had stepped easily into a political role, allowing his other siblings to lead their lives however they might like. Mino had become a somewhat unkempt but goldhearted school principal, and their sister was a travel journalist. If either of them had children, or if Isa hadn’t been an only child… maybe he would have had some level of choice in his life’s course. Mino only nodded and rushed over to the snack table to steal some of the hors d'oeuvres, which he pronounced as ‘horse divorce’. Asuka’s thought seemed to be correct, because as soon as Mino had left and she’d sat down on the couch beside Isa, one of the dinner party guests approached him.

“You’re… Utsuro Ichijou, aren’t you? Your father pointed you out,” The guest asked, holding out a hand. Isa stayed silent as he shook it, and nodded at the man whose Japanese made it clear he was some sort of foreigner, “Pleasure to meet you. I heard about that embezzlement case, recently. Good job on getting the culprit put away.”

“Oh,” Utsuro just said, shrugging, “It wasn’t like it was difficult. That was a case where the defendant actually was guilty, after all.”

“Well, it was still impressive. It’s interesting, though… why won’t you take publicized cases, or allow photographs with you in them to be shared? I thought previously that, being an eighteen year old you might have dreadful acne and want to hide that, but you really are very pretty,” He questioned, putting a hand out and brushing Isa’s cheek. He grabbed him by the wrist and glared at him.

“Don’t touch me, you’re old enough to be my father. My reasons for keeping my image hidden are for me and me alone to know, and given that I haven’t even caught your name, for all I know you could just be some criminal who snuck in,” Isa’s voice was as blank as usual, the words themselves enough to convey his negative opinion of the man.

“Utsuro!” Asuka butted in, glaring with some slight glimpse into the disappointment and anger she might show while in private, “That’s no way to speak with a guest of ours! For your information, his oldest child is fourteen, so he is /not/ old enough to be your father. Also, you should have recognized him! This is Francois Le Bel. He lives in France, but is an influential financial benefactor of the Dove Party.”

“Then what’s he doing at a Hawk Party event?” Isa asked, face unchanging. Monsieur Le Bel squirmed under his gaze, and he almost smirked. That was one thing he was glad for; his eyes did have that effect on people, and what wasn’t to be proud of there? Being intimidating was a very sought-after skill.

“Well,” The Le Bel straightened his collar, “It’s because regardless of any affiliations I may have, I am a high-standing power in the political affairs of Japan. Besides… I both agree and disagree with these two parties on different matters. My affiliation is more… on the neutral side. I decide where to donate my money on a year to year basis.”

“And it’s events like these that help him to make his decision…” Asuka noted with a sight grimace, lightly kicking Isa in the shin.

“Well, I’m not involved in any politics yet,” Isa said, shrugging, “So I’d recommend speaking with one of the adults here.”

“You are an adult, Utsuro, you’re eighteen years old,” Asuka reminded him, now glowering.

“I… wouldn’t say that… I am an adult…” Isa muttered, scooting away from his mother before standing up suddenly and walking towards the door.

“Ah! Utsuro, where do you think you’re going!?” Asuka questioned, getting to her feet and stomping over to him, heels clicking on the hardwood floor.

“Back to my apartment. You never said I had to stay the whole time. Besides, if I am an adult now, I can have the jurisdiction to say that there’s something I need to get home and do, even if there isn’t, to escape an unpleasant situation,” He raised his eyebrows and turned back around, opening the door, “Don’t worry. You’ll get your picture,” He rolled his eyes as he left.

As soon as he was out, his posture changed completely. He stood up perfectly straight while in that house, but the minute he left its dreadful influence he adopted an incredibly extreme slouch. He really didn’t need to get any shorter than he already was, but he did it anyway. In moments he’d hailed a taxi, and was on his way back to his apartment. It was much more enjoyable, to live away from his parents. An outburst like the one he’d just had wouldn’t be enough to get his finances cut, anyway. Likely his punishment would just be to attend some other brown-nosing party, and to behave better at it. As long as he was out of there for now, he was fine with it.

Upon arriving back at his apartment, he sighed and took off his coat. Using the mirror on the inside of the closet door he took a picture, sent it to his mother, then deleted it from his phone and pulled pajamas from that closet he was using. They were several sizes too big for him, fleecy, and covered with a gaudy snowflake pattern that any self-respecting person would be embarrassed to be seen in… but they were comfortable, and it wasn’t like anybody would be seeing him in his pajamas anyhow. He could indulge in the comfort of fuzzy pjs sometimes.

In fact, after an unsettling evening like that, he deserved to indulge in a few things. He wasn’t hungry, so he wouldn’t make any food, but he would make himself some tea, and maybe hang around on a scientific forum that he often frequented, just for the fun of it. Biology and anatomy were fascinating subjects. He’d always enjoyed the mandatory science credits better than any classes which contributed to his actual degree, but it was doomed to remain a hobby.

As soon as he logged in, however, he noticed something strange. He’d received a direct message; something which rarely happened on this forum. Congratulations on being one of the top participants in the weekly tests generally came about publicly, and he ignored them. Scoring well in some online biology exam was hardly his idea of impressive, especially when it was only his hobby. With a shrug, he opened the direct message.

Tohri_Nishikikouji: I saw your scores on the most recent tests… and I have come to the conclusion that you are a LIAR!!!!!!!!!!! This section of the forums is for students and hobbyists, but you are CLEARLY a PROFESSIONAL!

Isa read the message, then groaned.  
What a drama queen.

But, he didn’t have anything better to do, so he may as well reply.


	2. Chapter 2

Isshiki_Mishio: I am a hobbyist  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: IMPOSSIBLE! Even if you DID belong on this forum, >:[ which you do not >:[[ you would have to be a STUDENT not a HOBBYIST  
Isshiki_Mishio: The only science classes I took were what I needed for graduation credits. Every other class was for my degree.  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: DEGREE IN WHAT  
Isshiki_Mishio: I’m a lawyer. Stop abusing the shift key. It never did anything to you. Keyboard keys are generally not bad.  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: THE AMPERSAND IS BAD  
Isshiki_Mishio: &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: I dislike you  
Isshiki_Mishio: Okay? I don’t care. A lot of people dislike me.  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: Eh? Thats sad now I feel bad WAIT was that your plan all along just to make me feel bad about accusing you  
Isshiki_Mishio: No. I couldn’t care less how you feel about me. Now is there any reason you confronted me? You don’t even take the biology tests.  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: YOU HAD THE HIGHEST SCORES IN ANY CATEGORY ON THE ENTIRE WEBSITE THIS WEEK  
Isshiki_Mishio: Did I?  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: YOU DON’T EVEN CARE???  
Isshiki_Mishio: Not really. I’m a hobbyist. This is just something I do for fun. It really has no bearing on my life in general.  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: You sound like a sad person  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: Your profile says you’re 18?????? What right has such a young person to be so BITTER?? and also be a lawyer  
Isshiki_Mishio: I skipped a lot of grades.  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: that doesnt answer the bitterness question  
Isshiki_Mishio: What do you care, you just said you dislike me.  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: NOT ANYMORE now I am only WORRIED ABOUT YOU because I am a KIND AND CONSIDERATE PERSON  
Isshiki_Mishio: Okay.  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: So… I will be meeting with you in person to discuss your bitterness.  
Isshiki_Mishio: What? No. You can’t do that.  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: I absolutely CAN and you WILL meet me at the McDonalds three blocks from your apartment building at three PM on Saturday  
Isshiki_Mishio: Oh, IP tracking. Clever. Whatever, I’m not going. I’ve never even been to a McDonald’s in my life.  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: SUIT YOURSELF but kindness like mine doesnt come around every day

 

Isa took this opportunity to check Nishikikouji’s profile and, surprisingly enough, found that the gender box was left empty; no other box was, even the most confusingly included and pointless ones, so Isa wasn’t keen on supposing that it was only an accident. Also… this person was nineteen years old. Surprising. The way they acted made them seem much younger. Then again, they did know how to track IPs… Isa wasn’t too worried, given that the most accurate result that could get them was what building he lived in. In any case… he sighed. He may as well take a risk for once in his life.

Isshiki_Mishio: Fine. I’ll meet you there. On one condition. Isshiki Mishio is an alias. I’d appreciate it if you called me… Isa Souma.  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: OF COURSE I WILL DO THAT correct names are very important to me and I hate aliases  
Isshiki_Mishio: So… your name is actually Nishikikouji.  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: Yes isnt it GLORIOUS  
Isshiki_Mishio: It’s a mouthful. Anyway, I guess I’ll be seeing you on Saturday.  
Tohri_Nishikikouji: YOU WILL

Isa sighed heavily and rubbed his temples. This person was certainly… something. He still wasn’t sure he wanted to meet them in person, but he couldn’t very well bail out now. Plus, this was… an opportunity, to potentially befriend somebody who he wouldn’t have to worry about losing with as much ease as the last one. Especially given the fact he was out of school now, he wouldn’t otherwise have much chance to meet people. At work… well, socialization was particularly off the table.

He had expected to relax this evening, but ended up very much not doing so; a minor setback, really. He could always remedy the fact by going to bed early. So he did.

-

Saturday came about much sooner than Isa wanted or expected it to, but he supposed that something you’re dreading must always approach more quickly than is rational. It helped, of course, that he had the days in between to himself aside from a bit of work on a simple case; with nothing to sit through with stretched and boring hours, that gave leeway for time to slip away.

Saturday at noon was when Isa woke up; he normally didn’t sleep so incredibly late, but today… wasn’t a good day. It had nothing to do with his dread for later in the day, either, but rather the fact that when he first started waking up, he didn’t feel at all like moving due to being in a great amount of pain. Joint pain, to be precise. He’d groaned and gone back to sleep, hoping it would subside by the time he woke up for real, but it did not. He did have a cane that he’d purchased for days like this, but he wasn’t going to use that to go to this meeting. He was already going to make a bad enough impression, with his greasy hair and oversized “athleticwear”. It was the only clothing he could find that made him look anything like he intended to; his parents kept track of all his credit and debit card purchases, so he had to use cash to buy anything he didn’t want them knowing about, and it was very difficult to find somewhere to buy a binder outside of the internet. Besides, he wasn’t sure he’d even have the motor skill to put one on, especially on days as painful as this one.

And it was with this very same continued pain that Isa made his way out of the apartment and the three blocks to that McDonalds. It was not a very long walk, not long enough that a taxi driver would even be willing to take him there, but it was definitely a tough one in his current state. The soft chill of February air really didn’t help at all, either… but he did eventually get there, all the while glaring at anybody who looked at him funny. He was hardly even in the door when somebody walked up to him… grinning.

How they could tell that he was Isa Souma, well, that was a mystery, but it was obvious that they did. They were… exactly what Isa would expect, based on the way that they’d been acting online. Very luxurious looking blonde hair, pulled back in a high ponytail yet waist-length anyway. Quite a feat, for somebody as tall as this person. They were dressed in some pretty normal-looking clothing, actually. A cute ensemble, with a somewhat short skirt and a t-shirt for some band with the collar cut wide enough to fall off of their shoulders. They bent over to talk to him, “So, you must be Isa Souma! Well… you have no sense of fashion whatsoever, but you do have pretty eyes.”

Isa glared, but it seemed to have no effect. Just wonderful. He sighed, going and sitting in a booth, “And you’re Tohri Nishikikouji.”

“You can’t just sit down there if we don’t buy anything. That’s loitering and it’s illegal,” Tohri said matter-of-factly.

“Here,” Isa shrugged, handing him a crumpled twenty, “Get something. Then we won’t be loitering.”

“Wouldn’t you want to go somewhere better? I just picked here because it’s a good landmark for just about anyone…” They mumbled, leaning on the table.

“No, I don’t really want to stand up,” Isa explained somewhat, shaking his head, and Tohri just shrugged as they walked over to the counter, leaving Isa’s money on the table. Within minutes they’d returned with a 20-piece mcnugget and several burgers.

“I forgot to ask what you wanted so I just grabbed a bunch of stuff,” Tohri shrugged as they dropped the tray on the table (quite literally; one of the burgers fell onto the floor.) They bent over to pick it up, since it was still wrapped, then slid into the bench across from Isa.

“Oh, I won’t be eating anything,” Isa shook his head, leaning crossed arms on the table, trying to get comfortable, “I’m not hungry.”

“You…” Tohri started, eyebrows raised (bonus effect of showing off their gaudy eyeshadow) then pointed at him, “You seem really… small. Not short small. Doesn’t eat enough food small. I mean, I’m skinny, but you’re just completely unhealthy. When was the last time you ate anything?”

“...An intern gave me a granola bar yesterday. Before that, my mom made me try a bacon-wrapped scallop at her dinner party. It was disgusting,” He shrugged, “That’s plenty. I can pay you back for all of the excess food, though.”

“This is unacceptable,” Tohri responded flatly, “Completely unacceptable,” Shockingly flat for them, actually, but the return to drama came with the next line as they pushed their hands against the table, leaning over it completely to be uncomfortably close to Isa, “You are clearly taking horrible care of yourself. I will not sleep, I will not rest for an INSTANT until I have remedied this issue,” They sighed, sitting back down and picking at their nails, “Jeeze. You are /just/ like my middle school boyfriend was. Except that he wasn’t a prodigy. Or trans,” They shrugged, “Or maybe he is now. I wouldn’t know. He was too emotional to really keep up with after we broke up.”

“Wait. What did you say just then. You,” Isa found himself malfunctioning somewhat, staring at the table to avoid meeting Tohri’s eyes.

“Don’t worry dearie, clothes that baggy and atrocious you pass plenty well enough,” They rolled their eyes, resting a hand against their cheek and waving a finger of the other hand in the air, “I’m just savvy in this sort of thing. Very observant. I can spot a loose screw in a freight elevator from twelve feet away, and when it comes to people it’s no different. Even the way you’ve been keeping your arms across your chest this whole time would be enough of a tell without knowing anything else about you,” They shrugged, “Plus, it does take one to know one. In case you hadn’t gathered, I’m genderfluid myself. Of course I can spot a distressed trans guy. Oh, and you should keep your arms at your sides. It’s a much more comfortable position, and better for you in the long run too.”

Isa moved his arms, and it was better, “...Thanks.”

“Of course. Now, eat something. I’m sure that /something/ here will suit your tastes. If nothing else I did get one plain burger with no toppings whatsoever. Drab and boring, but there’s not much there to dislike,” They said, pushing the tray full of burgers towards Isa. He sighed, but did pick up one of the burgers at random and unwrapped it. A cheeseburger with no topping but some onion; well, that was good enough. He started eating it. Tohri grabbed the nuggets themself, and dug around in the burger pile to find the sauce packets, grabbing a green one then holding it up and winking, “Sweet and sour. Just like me.”

“How is a person sour?” Isa asked in between his slow bites. Once he started eating, it really hit him how hungry he actually was, but if he ate too quickly he would probably throw up.

“That’s…” Tohri seemed flustered, shaking their head, “I just am! Don’t ruin my harmless flirting!”

“I will ruin all of your harmless flirting,” Isa responded in a flat tone, completely unperturbed.

“Isa Souma! I have taken you on as my own personal responsibility! Don’t make me regret that decision!” Tohri insisted, then shoved a handful of french fries into their mouth angrily.

“I don’t really care if you regret that decision, I never asked you to coddle me,” He shrugged.

“Wow,” Tohri sighed, shaking their head, “You are SERIOUSLY dead inside.”

“What makes you say that?” Isa questioned, raising an eyebrow.

“Well, if I was in your position… a small, clueless, lost-in-life boy being offered assistance by a GORGEOUS person who’s clearly got it all together… I would be jumping for joy! But you don’t seem to care at all.”

“You’re only one year older than me and I’ve already got a legal degree,” Isa responded simply, putting the remains of his burger down and sitting back on the bench, “And you’re not /that/ attractive. Plus, I’m not sure there’s much you could do for me anyway. I have to stay closeted, mostly.”

“So you admit you do find me at least a little bit attractive,” Tohri grinned, throwing their hair back, but soon turned serious, looking a bit perplexed, “Why so, though? You seem to live alone, and you are technically an adult. You do you.”

“It’s not that simple. Just because I’m no longer living with my parents doesn’t mean I’m in any way living my own life. As long as I have any connection to them, I can’t make any decisions for myself,” He shrugged, “It’s a pain, really.”

“That’s more than just a pain! That sounds honestly horrible! Your parents sound like really nasty people…” Tohri grumbled, biting at one of their clearly false long-as-hell nails, “Why not just… secede entirely?” The question was genuine; they figured if Isa was capable of doing that, he would have already.

“My parents pay my expenses, for the most part. And they’re very powerful people, too. I’m their only child, so I’m sure if I was to try and cut myself off from them they’d come looking for me. As it currently stands, I have no method of escape. I’m beyond any means of solution, so I’ve really given up trying and caring.”

“So you’ve just… resigned to stay the way you are? Miserable?” Tohri asked, frowning, “Unacceptable. I will not allow it.”

“The universe seems to be against me. I’ve never been one to stand up to a force like that.”

“What?? No, no, that’s nonsense!” Tohri insisted, increasing in volume again, “You study biology to such an extent that the only experiments you could do would be to go against the laws that nature set out! Of course you stand up to the universe, only by being so scientifically brilliant!”

“You flatter me. But I won’t be doing any experiments. As I said, my studies are a hobby. My career lies in legal courts.”

“But it doesn’t have to be that way!” Tohri shouted, standing up suddenly and injuring himself against the table several times in the process. When people started staring, they shrunk and sat back down, but stayed equally as intense, “The college I’m enrolled at has a great bio program too! You could get another degree! You’re obviously smart enough for it!”

“No, I couldn’t,” He frowned as he looked away, “Listen. When I say that the world is against me, I do mean that I have no option but to live the way I currently am. I must be a lawyer, so that I might follow my parents into politics in my future. I must follow my parents, because they control me. They are the sort of people I’d fear could kill me if I displeased them too much. For that same reason, I must continue acting as their ‘daughter’ and any efforts to make myself more masculine must be temporary. My arms don’t work well enough to put on a binder. I’m one hundred percent trapped.”

“...Oh.” Tohri responded quietly, now truly understanding the weight of the situation. Their heart sank with pity, “That’s… incredibly unfortunate. I would like to give those parents of yours a very aggressive piece of my mind.”

“I can’t imagine that would be very intimidating,” Isa continued with the same blunt honesty as always, “The one advantage you might have in your height is null and void. My parents are both very tall.”

Tohri just grumbled for a moment before responding with a degree of scorn, “Figures I would end up with the most difficult person in the area when I finally decided to do something nice for once.”

“Whatever happened to you being a kind and considerate person?”

“I AM a kind and considerate person, it’s only RARE for me to act on my kindness. I thought that a sad person with an admirable intellect would be the PERFECT opportunity, but now you’re being difficult every step of the way!” Tohri groaned, turning their nose up, “But! I will not give up!”

“You can give up if you want to.”

“I will NOT!” Tohri insisted, still at a much higher volume than was generally acceptable indoors, “Isa Souma, you and I are going to be friends, even if I have to die trying!”

“I’m not sure it’s possible to be friends with a dead person,” Isa noted.

“Oh, it is. It is,” Tohri assured him with a nod and a slightly unsettling grin.

“Okay… well,” Isa stood up slowly, supporting himself on the table, and looked at the receipt for a moment before handing Tohri the amount the food had cost them, “I’m going home. But I suppose I’ll see you around.”

“H-Hey! Souma! What ever happened to not wanting to stand?” Tohri demanded to know.

“It didn’t change. However, I do need to get home eventually, and I’m feeling almost up to it. That’s about as good as it will get, so I’m going to get home now, while I’m not in so much pain.”

Concern crossed Tohri’s face again, “You said something about your arms, too… exactly what sort of health issues do you have on your plate, in addition to the clear number of emotional ones??”

“I’m not sure exactly. I haven’t mentioned it to my doctor, nor do I intend to, but in my own personal research I’ve determined that it’s most likely fibromyalgia,” He sighed, still leaning his weight against the table, “Another daily nuisance for me, nothing to worry about. I’ll get some aspirin on my way home.”

“And you plan to WALK this distance?? No, no, I cannot allow that,” Tohri shook their head resolutely, standing up themself then leaning over and putting one arm under Isa’s knees, and another around his waist, picking him up.

“Put me down,” Isa didn’t sound /nearly/ as aggressive as Tohri had feared he might. Still aggressive, but not so bad.

“Why? I do know where your building is, and the nearest drugstore. I’m clearly capable of carrying you that distance, too.”

“It’s embarrassing.”

“Well, which would you prefer? Embarrassment or pain?” Tohri asked condescendingly.

“...I guess you’re right,” He grumbled, and Tohri just nodded, satisfied with themself as they started to walk. At least as a unit they got fewer strange looks than individually; the overfashionable and the unfashionable must balance out, somehow. In any case, not needing to walk did make the trip less awful for Isa, even if being carried around by Tohri was an unfamiliar adventure in embarrassment. Tohri even had him sit on a bench outside while they went in and got the aspirin for him. Obnoxious as they were, at least they were being fairly considerate after all. After getting the aspirin they picked Isa up again, and brought him back to the apartment building. He was going to go the rest of the way himself, except that he soon discovered the elevator was out of order, “Well that’s just stupendous.”

“No worries, I can take you up the stairs,” Tohri sounded particularly bright, they must really be enjoying humiliating Isa like this. At least, that was what he thought, and maybe it was a small portion of it, but really they were just eager to be helpful. Shockingly enough, “What’s your apartment number?”

“307. Thanks,” Isa thanked them reluctantly, then stayed quiet as they took him up the stairs and to the door of his apartment, setting him down on his feet right in front of it. Isa pulled out his key and opened the door, then Tohri stepped inside behind him. He gave them an odd look, but didn’t feel up to getting in an argument, so he just went to sit on the couch.

“So, Isa Souma…” Tohri started, closing the door behind themself, “I have something to admit to you. I don’t usually carry such a large purse,” They held up their bag, “But the thing is that, my roommate over at the dorms sort of… got fed up with me. And kicked me out. Something about not respecting his personal boundaries? Oops. Not anything really bad! I guess I just flirted too much, and used his shampoo accidentally, and never did the dishes, and always ate his leftovers out of the fridge… Anyway, I’m not really welcome back. I was going to go get a new dorm assignment, but then I’d probably be stuck in a room without a roommate at all, and that’s no fun!”

“What’s your point?” 

“Well, this purse, thanks to my stupendous packing skills… holds all of my worldly belongings,” Tohri said, opening the bag and dumping it out on Isa’s coffee table, “I’m going to dump it on your coffee table.”

“Actually, you already did,” Isa noted, leaning forward to look at the confusing amount of things which had spilled from the bag. Lots of clothing that was folded up VERY small, six different pairs of shoes, and various assorted other things, the majority of which were cosmetic items.

“Details, details,” Tohri waved their hand dismissively, leaning over and picking up something off the coffee table, “Anyway, I’m staying here. Eight PM tonight you can tell me to get out, and I will, but otherwise I’m not going.”

“I see,” Isa nodded, “That’s certainly an interesting way of doing things. I can’t say I’m even the least bit surprised, now that I’ve met you.”

“You are so UNBOTHERED by everything, it’s precious,” Tohri joked as they went around to the back of the couch and put something in Isa’s hair.

“I wouldn’t say completely unbothered. I’m very bothered. I just can’t say I can be bothered enough to do anything,” He muttered, “What exactly, are you putting in my hair?”

“Dry shampoo. I just couldn’t stand to look at the grease in it any longer.”

“That certainly doesn’t feel dry.”

“No, no, dry shampoo is just what it’s called. It doesn’t need to be rinsed out and your hair doesn’t have to be wet for it to work,” Tohri explained, then paused a second. Isa felt a bit of painful tugging on his hair, but didn’t turn to glare, figuring that could make it worse, “Sorry about that. One of my nails got stuck in a knot. It’s all fine now, though. I’m going to grab a hairbrush, so that doesn’t happen again…”

“You come into my house, drop your shit all over my coffee table, then start doing my hair. You really are an enigma, Tohri Nishikikouji…” Isa mumbled, mostly to himself.

“What? Is being an enigma such a bad thing?” Tohri questioned, now armed with a hairbrush which had a garish floral pattern all over the handle.

“No. I suppose it’s not the end of the world,” Isa shrugged, pulling out his phone to mess around with a game on it, “Nishikikouji?”

“Yes?” Tohri responded, starting to brush Isa’s hair. He was clearly getting through knots, but had a gentle touch, and it didn’t hurt.

“No need to wait till eight for an answer. You can stay here. But… I do reserve the right to kick you out at any time if you get too annoying.”


	3. Chapter 3

Tohri Nishikikouji was certain that they’d found exactly the right person to simultaneously improve the life of and shamelessly mooch from. Isa Souma was a truly pathetic, sad little man when it came to anything outside of academic skills. He rarely showered, didn’t do his laundry anywhere near often enough, hardly ate any food at all, and didn’t seem to have any friends whatsoever… but he was also brilliant, when it came to anything he could apply his brain to. And, he didn’t have much self-pity either. He just didn’t really care to care for himself, it seemed, but now Tohri was here to both help him with that and fill the role of baseline friend. And… live in his house. Which was a very nice apartment, really. Fancy. Obviously expensive, but then, Isa had mentioned having powerful parents. Tohri even got a room all to themself.

It was… probably the messiest room in the house. For as little as Isa cared for himself, he did take the time to keep his apartment clean. Tohri had no such qualms, and while they would help clean the rest of the place, his room would be their own space where they could throw outfits together on the floor just as much as they pleased. Though, they kept their own clothing much cleaner than Isa kept his when left to his own devices. Some of the lighter grays had gotten a bit stained when Tohri had thrown them in with their own laundry, of course, but better slightly red sweatshirts than dirty sweatshirts, right?

Well, on a scale of sweatshirts. Tohri still found Isa’s sense of style something atrocious, but they were still searching for a way to help him become a bit more stylish while still being comfortable. This was within two days, actually, but that was longer than Tohri usually took to do anything. They did have a few ideas floating around their head, though. They could always give Isa some contouring; it might take some practice to deal with such a different face than they were experienced with, but they could do it. Plus, if Isa was okay with it, Tohri could get him a binder with a zipper and zip it for him, thus eliminated all fine motor efforts on his part. There were a few options. It wasn’t much, but it was something.

The past two nights Tohri had been there, they’d eaten at work; waitressing at a restaurant until closing gave them the benefit of free food, but they also couldn’t work every day of the week. Credit hours plus work hours equaled stress, and stress caused wrinkles (plus health issues) so Tohri wanted to avoid it as much as they possibly could. So, they had Tuesdays and Fridays off. And, on those days, they had to figure out food for themself.

They were hanging around in the living room, sitting on the couch with their legs draped over the back of it (wearing shorts today, so it wasn’t like they had the intention of giving Isa a panty shot) when they started getting hungry for dinner, so they exited the makeup tutorial they were watching on their phone and pulled up the number of a nearby pizza place, putting the phone on speaker for convenience.

“Who are you calling?” Isa asked, only looking up from the papers he was reading through when he heard the ring.

“I’m ordering a pizza,” Tohri answered, shrugging, only for Isa to stand up and hang up the call before the place answered, “Now, what was that for?”

“All the pizza around here is disgusting,” Isa responded simply, “I wouldn’t think you’d like it.”

“Well, this is basically a college town. And, well, rich people,” They raised a hand somewhat, “It’s the only place around here that does delivery, and they don’t care about quality because they know that the rich people wouldn’t eat there anyway, and college kids eat anything put in front of them. I don’t feel like going out for dinner, so I was going to order in. Even though… it is disgusting.”

“That’s ridiculous. If you don’t want to go out, and you admit the takeout is disgusting, just make something,” Isa said, crossing his arms.

“Oh, no, I don’t know how to cook,” Tohri shook their head, “That’s why I was always stealing my roommate’s leftovers. His cooking was so good… he could even make instant noodles interesting!”

“...Fine. I’ll make you something, then,” Isa sighed as if this was a necessary chore, turning to walk into the kitchen and open the fridge, trying to see if he even had anything to do the cooking with.

“What? Souma, you can cook? That seems outside of the realm of your general expertise. Why must you continue to prove yourself good at things?” Tohri whined as they followed Isa into the other room, “...Thanks, though.”

“Of course I can cook. I was taught when I was four years old. That’s why, even with the fibromyalgia, I have incredibly fine-tuned knife skills,” It seemed nearly threatening, but he was only stating facts, “It’s a good skill to have, even if I’m not fond of how I came about it. Now, I’m perfectly willing to cook for you, however… I rarely shop for groceries. If there is anything particular you want, you will have to purchase it yourself… currently, it appears the best I could do would be scrambled eggs with deli meat.”

“Honestly, just about anything is better than that takeout,” Tohri nodded, leaning on the kitchen counter, “And, that does sound good. However, I demand that you eat some of it as well. In fact, you should eat some of anything you cook. I’ve been too busy the last two days to make sure you’re eating, but I can’t imagine you have been… this will be a good way to guarantee you at least eat something substantial when I am present for dinner!”

“That’s an interesting way of getting me to eat,” Isa smirked slightly as he pulled the items out of the fridge, “But then, I suppose if I must cook for you, I may as well eat some of it myself. You are occasionally clever after all.”

“Why are you talking like it’s some huge chore? You volunteered to do it, you know,” Tohri pouted, adjusting one of the rhinestones which was coming loose from their nail.

“Just because I volunteered to do it doesn’t mean that it’s not a chore. Doing anything for you is a chore, regardless of if I said I would or not,” Isa continued, still with that slight but altogether insufferable smirk.

“And how exactly does THAT logic work!?” Tohri demanded to know, standing up straight and waving their hands around with all the same melodrama as usual.

“I don’t know. It just does,” Isa was obviously making fun of them by now as he started actually cooking the meal.

“Urghhh!” Tohri stomped on the ground in frustration, crossing their arms and tossing their hair back, “Sometimes you can be SO insufferable, Isa Souma!”

“I’m aware. However, you are infinitely moreso than I am,” He nodded, putting the better portion of the now-cooked food onto a plate and handing it to Tohri, “Hence, I will always be more annoyed by you than you are of me, and you can’t even deny that fact.”

“This is untrue. At least I am UPFRONT about my emotions! You don’t even do that much, thus making you near-impossible to work with!” Tohri protested as they took the plate, then pulled a fork out of a nearby drawer (lucky guess, that it was the silverware drawer) and tried the eggs, then frowned in seeming annoyance, “You… even went to the trouble of seasoning these, didn’t you?”

“What sort of person doesn’t season food when cooking?” He asked as if it was the most perplexing question he’d ever been asked.

“I DEMAND to know how you learned to cook, Souma! It is obviously not a regular activity of yours, given your state of health…” Tohri burst out, though without the wild arm movements, as they were busy using their arms to eat.

“I already told you. I learned when I was very young,” He answered quietly and he picked at his own.

“I did not ask WHEN you learned, did I? I asked HOW you learned,” They countered back, glaring.

“Oh. Well,” His countenance was just as unshaken as always, but his voice seemed a little bit different than usual, “My mother taught me.”

A sore subject? Well, Tohri would seize this opportunity to get Isa to open up about his emotions more! “Do you and your mother… not get along?”

“You could say that,” Isa seemed unbothered now, “Asuka only thinks of herself, and her self-image too. The networks want her to seem like a perfect mother with a perfect child. The unfortunate byproduct of that request would be my childhood. In which I was supposedly taught how to be a perfect child, by a far less-than-perfect mother. Of course I would have been taught how to cook.”  
Unspoken, but clear in the way that Isa said “child” was the truth that he had been expected to be a perfect daughter.

So of course his mother had taught him such a timelessly ‘feminine’ skill as cooking.

Tohri would drop the issue, but not without taking to mind that Isa had called his mother Asuka. That name might be important, after all. They were determined to figure out who Isa’s ‘important people’ parents were, so they could take the chance if they ever got the opportunity to raise hell on the people who had made Isa… like this.

-

“ISA SOUMA,” Tohri shouted while sliding into the room where Isa was, being only in socks certainly made over-dramatic entrances within the apartment a bit easier. As glamorous as it was to stomp into a room with six inch heels, sliding around the side of a doorway fit their purposes much better.

“Yes? You don’t have to shout so loudly. Sometimes I think you might earn me a noise complaint in a building with soundproof walls…” Isa responded, sighing.

“I have discovered that which you were attempting to hide from me!” They said triumphantly, pointing at him.

“...I can’t think of anything I was trying to hide from you. Honestly, I might even say that you know me better than anybody else,” This was only a matter of fact, though. When it came down to it, Tohri would be the only one to know as much as they did about Isa. Even his uncle wasn’t aware of the fibromyalgia, and he didn’t confide anything in his family or coworkers. Nor did he have any other friends. The statement was not so much one of affection as it was the flat truth.

“You were too trying to hide something from me! The fact that you, are Utsuro Ichijou! The mysterious lawyer who never takes a publicized case, and assumed next in line for the Ichijou political legacy!” 

“I was never trying to hide that. However…” He frowned, turning to glare at Tohri, “You would be well-obliged to never associate that name or summary with me again. To you, I am Isa Souma. It is only in conversation with others, and only when absolutely necessary, that you will in any way refer to me as Utsuro Ichijou.”

“...Oh.” They frowned, taking a step back and looking away, face all screwed up in some expression that couldn’t quite be described but could be summed up as...regretful? “I… apologize. I didn’t notice exactly what I was doing, but now realize that was actually INCREDIBLY rude of me.”

“You’re right, it was. It’s mildly disappointing to be deadnamed by one of the only people who actually refers to me as the correct one. However… I forgive you, as long as it doesn’t happen again. You are rather clueless at times so I can’t really blame you for making such an idiotic mistake.”

“You cannot just forgive me outright like that. It was a detestable misstep! I need to do SOMETHING to make it up to you,” Tohri insisted, now standing right in front of Isa.

“No, you don’t,” He said, but one look at Tohri’s face revealed that was not an acceptable answer, “Fine. If you really feel the need, you can answer me a question that’s been bothering me for a while now.”

“Yes…?” They leaned forward a bit, expecting something important, or possibly embarrassing.

“Why do you wear high heels?”

“What?”

“You heard me. Why do you wear high heels. You’re already practically Tokyo Tower as it is, you don’t need to be any taller.”

“That… that’s a ridiculous question! Answering that can’t possibly redeem me for my mistake!”

“Well it’s not like there’s really anything I want from you. Except an answer to this question. Go on, spit it out.”

“It’s for fashion! Everybody knows that high heels are eternally better-looking than flats! The only shoes without a heel I even OWN are-”

“Yes, I’m aware. Those atrociously thigh-high converse,” Isa nodded.

“Ah! Souma, you’re starting to memorize my wardrobe!” They sat down on the couch next to him and leaned against him, poking his cheek with one of those false nails, “You’re not FALLING for me, are you?”

“Of course not. You just have such a garish collection of clothing that a few of the dreadful articles are bound to stick in my mind.”

“Of course not!? You WOUND me, Souma!” They joked, then stood up again, twirling around about 180 degrees before suddenly stopping and grinning, “I JUST remembered, I have a gift for you! Let me go get it from my room! Be right back!”

They ran off, with quite a bit of sliding, and returned in only a few moments with their hands behind their back, “You see, I had… an idea. Now, I know that your parents monitor all of your purchases, but I wasn’t certain how exactly, so I took every possible precaution by having my ex-roommate order this, seeing as now that I am no longer wreaking havoc on his living space, we get along much better. Now, I also know that you don’t quite have the fine motor control necessary for this, BUT,” Tohri then pulled out no other item than a zippering binder, with a flourish, “Should you wish, I will assist you with it!”

“Oh,” Isa looked up, and Tohri could have sworn they nearly saw him smile, “That’s… nice. Thank you.”

“There is truly no need to thank me! After all, Isa Souma, your emotional well-being IS my personal responsibility. This is only what I’m supposed to do, as a good friend,” They showed the rare bit of modesty, still grinning as Isa as they went and sat next to him again, nudging him with their elbow, “Plus… this also means we can start working on improving your sense of style, with no more need for constant horrendously baggy clothing.”

“Well, I did expect you’d have some ulterior motive. That’s not so bad. I refuse to try on anything too ridiculous though.”

“Can’t you try it, at least?? I want to see what you’d look like as a scene kid.”

“No.”


	4. Chapter 4

“Nishikikouji,” Isa started one morning without so much as a greeting when he walked into the kitchen. Tohri was still on their first cup of hot chocolate, which was earlier than Isa ever really got up on a normal day. He never had work till the afternoon, whereas Tohri often had early classes due to procrastinating on getting their schedule put together. So this was… a strange occurrence.

“What, not even a good morning? And it’s early. What do you want?” Tohri questioned, looking up to see that Isa looked… more done with the universe than usual. This left them concerned, “Is something wrong?”

It had been a few weeks now, since Tohri had shown up there. They referred to it as moved in, of course, but Isa still just said ‘showed up’ because he didn’t want to admit that he liked having Tohri around. It had been… two months, about, actually. They’d sort of lost track of time. In that time, of course, they’d taken Isa clothes shopping (and determined that sweater-vests looked particularly good on him) and also witness him returning to at least a small degree of health when it came to food. There weren’t really any lifestyle changes that could help with that chronic pain syndrome of his, but at least Tohri could help him improve in other areas.

“I’m going to a Christmas party my parents are holding later today. They’re expecting me to look… generally presentable, by politician’s standards. I rarely live up to these expectations, nor do I usually care, but… I’d like to be on their good side tonight,” He frowned, leaning a fist against his chin as he looked away, “So, I… need you to make me look good.”

“...Ah,” Tohri nodded, then stood up and walked over to Isa, leaning down to push his hair back a bit, then looking him in the eyes, “To tell you the truth I completely forgot it was Christmas today, I’ve never celebrated it… Are you sure you want to do this? I’m certain their standards would involve you looking very effeminate…”

“I’m… going to say something which might annoy them. We don’t exactly celebrate it either, but it’s an excuse for another Hawk Party event, and to corral the whole family into one place for dinner afterwards. If I make the extra effort to… be liked, by them, today, then it’ll probably go over much more smoothly. Besides. I’m sure I can trust you to walk the line between my comfort and their satisfaction.”

“Oh, Souma, I’m touched! You trust me with something!” They smiled, then turned Isa around, holding his shoulders and steering him into the other room, “Of course, I am one hundred percent capable of it. One of those short-sleeved blouses your mother sent you, with a vest of mine on top of it… the size difference should hide your figure well enough without it being obvious to them that something’s up. And… well, I’m sorry, but I don’t think we could get away with not putting you in a skirt.”

“No, I don’t think so either,” He mumbled quietly.

“Which would you prefer? A longer one, past your knees, or a shorter one with leggings?” Tohri asked, putting quite a bit of effort into this.

“Longer,” He answered, staring at one of the far walls, “I’d rather just keep my legs hidden completely, if I have to wear a skirt.”

“Well, you’ve clearly never done this for any past events…” They sighed, putting a hand against Isa’s cheek, “I’m sure you’d be fine if you didn’t start now.”

“No,” He grumbled slightly, “This is… somewhat important. I need to do it. Your ideas sound… great. Thank you.”

“...All right,” Tohri was much less active in their speech than usual. For Isa to say something like that was even more proof that he wasn’t okay with this, but… Tohri couldn’t exactly refuse him, either. If they left him to try and go through with this on his own (and they knew, he would) he’d just end up looking hideous AND being completely uncomfortable. They just could not allow that, “Well then. You should get a shower, and I’ll put the outfit together for you.”

“Right,” Isa nodded, standing up then wandering off towards the bathroom.

“Wait a minute,” Tohri stopped him, then stepped over and stood in front of him again, possibly the most concerned they’d looked since the day they met Isa, “You’re limping. Souma, I’m sure you could get away with just staying home today. This just seems like a recipe for COMPLETE and UTTER disaster.”

“...I have to go. It’s impossible to bail on an Ichijou event,” He crossed his arms, pushing past Tohri, “If I’m going to be miserable anyway, I may as well be miserable in a way that satisfies their ridiculous sensibilities.”

“Did you at least take an aspirin?” They called after Isa as he walked down the hallway.

“I’m going to. After my shower,” He nodded, then ducked into the bathroom. While Tohri heard him turn the shower on, they went to gather the pieces of the outfit in question, worrying all the while. Isa had never actually said much about his family, except that he disliked his parents, but Tohri could gather from what they knew of the Ichijou group on a political scale that they were not to be trusted. Plus, didn’t Isa even say once that if he made them too angry, his life could be in danger? It all reeked of bad news, and for Isa to so clearly be having a bad pain day was just the icing on the cake of rottenness.

However, there wasn’t anything Tohri could do but offer their support.

Later, once Isa was dressed and ready, and visibly uncomfortable but less so than he would be without Tohri’s help, he started to leave only for the aforementioned to grab his shoulder gently, “Wait. I should go with you.”

“No you shouldn’t,” He responded matter-of-factly.

“That’s… Okay. Probably correct,” They rolled their eyes, “Am I allowed to text you while you’re at this thing? I want to keep in contact with you, at least. I can serve as your link to sanity.”

“You? A link to sanity?” Isa raised his eyebrows and chuckled a bit, but then nodded, “But, yes. If there’s one thing they won’t ever pester me about it’s using my phone at these things. You can text me.”

“I still think you should bring your cane with you…” Tohri mumbled. Isa’s limping hadn’t improved at all after taking aspirin for it, and he was already pushing his limits so much today…

“I can’t do that, nobody knows there’s anything wrong with me, and they certainly wouldn’t accept my self-diagnosis as anything worth anyone’s time. Stop worrying so much. I’m going to be fine, really. I’ve dealt with plenty of these events before.”

“...All right,” Tohri sighed, letting go of Isa’s shoulder and straightening up, “Good luck.”

-

“Utsuro, darling, have you gained weight?” Asuka finally pointed out her child. The first ten minutes of the post-party family dinner had been spent winding down from the political talk they’d been engaging in all night (an inebriation of conservative ideals) and now it was finally time for Isa to get the third degree, as he usually did. As she said this, Asuka leaned over and pinched at his cheek.

“Yeah, a little bit,” Isa shrugged, “I’ve been eating a bit more regularly lately. Not starving myself with nothing but intern-fetched protein bars. I’ve been cooking, actually. Aren’t you proud?” His tone was condescending and passive-aggressive, as things usually were with his mother.

“Now, Utsuro, that’s all well and nice, but don’t get to eating TOO much!” His grandfather joked, and he just glared at him before speaking again.

“Did you know that people don’t much care if a male political candidate is overweight, but that the weight of a female candidate is an important part of the decision? A bit hypocritical, don’t you think?” He shot back. Referring to himself as female stung, but as long as he was going to get into an argument with his family members it may as well be in keeping with what they wanted from him, at least in some way.

“That makes sense. Men aren’t much to look at in the first place, but if it’s gonna be a woman in the seat, she oughta be pretty cute,” Masura added in his contribution. It was… family habit, to try and start debates with each other. Especially Isa, who was still uninvolved in any political campaigns.

“...I see. In other news, I’ve decided to take up a second degree,” Maybe this wasn’t the best way to change the subject, but then, he wasn’t good at social situations. It wasn’t like a trial where he could plot out counterpoints to anything his opponent might say.

“Oh? Dearie, what is it? Public speaking?” Asuka asked, seeming legitimately excited at that prospect.

“Maybe next. Biology, for now. Just to broaden my horizons, of course. I don’t intend on switching career paths,” Isa assured everybody, especially Asuka. However, he could see his mother’s face fall as he said that, and she immediately brought up something else to the rest of the table, leaving the topic of Isa’s second degree to the wayside.

He sighed. That… didn’t go well, honestly. It was clear by the way she reacted that Asuka was going to speak with him about this more later. The dinner table conversation had moved away from him for now, though, so he pulled out his phone.

● SOUMA how has it been since the party potion ended  
● How are you feeling  
● Souma?  
● Are you there?  
○ Yes. I apologize. I had to engage in conversation briefly.  
● You didnt answer my other question are you feeling okay  
○ Not really. It’s fine, though. I’ll just sleep late tomorrow.  
● Im worried about you  
○ Don’t bother. This is unsettling. Can’t you just go back to being insufferable the normal way?  
● I cant DO THAT when Im WORRIED, understand??????  
● I DO CARE ABOUT YOU  
● AND THIS IS MORE INSUFFERABLE FOR ME TOO BECAUSE YOU WON’T LET ME JUST WORRY  
○ Chill out Captain Caps Lock.

“Utsuro? Who are you texting?” Masura asked, leaning over to try and look at his phone. Isa turned off the screen and put the phone face-down in his lap.

“Just a friend,” He responded simply, folding his hands.

“You… have a friend?” Asuka joined in the conversation, sounding shocked. Of course she would be; she was the one to witness her child rarely socializing throughout his entire life.

“That’s right,” Isa nodded, then as soon as his parents looked away, pulled his phone out again.

“Well, who is this friend?” Asuka questioned, but was thankfully still not trying to peer at the screen.

● Captain Caps Lock????  
○ Enough of the banter for now. What do I say to people who need to think you’re cis?  
● If you have to then just say Im a girl, those sort of people would consider me to be one anyway

“Her name’s Tohri. She’s nice. Very fashionable. She helped me get ready today,” He explained, and Asuka actually seemed taken aback.

“So… the outfits I asked you to wear before, that you wouldn’t, just weren’t… fashionable…?”

Isa just tugged at the sleeve of the blouse under the vest, “I’m wearing one of the blouses you sent me. It wasn’t a matter of fashion before, it was a matter of being motivated to look good. I never was, but now I guess I am. I’m picking myself up. Becoming a better person,” He only sort of lied.

“I see…” She seemed to accept that answer, but continued to give him the stink eye throughout the rest of dinner, and kept a hand on his shoulder as people began to file out to signify that he ought to stay. As soon as everyone else had left, she pulled him over to a corner, nails digging into his arm, “Utsuro. What is this about taking up a degree in biology? There’s no reason for you to do anything with science, it would just be a waste of time and money.”

“I…” He muttered, trying to pull his arm away, only for her to tighten her grip and twist it a little. Under normal circumstances it would just be mildly uncomfortable, but not for somebody with joint pain, and especially not on a bad day. He winced and took a hissing breath through his teeth to regain his composure before answering her, “It’s only something I’m interested in. I know we have the money for it, there’s not much out there that would put a dent in the Ichijou family finances.”

“Just because we can afford it doesn’t mean it makes sense to spend money on completely useless things,” Asuka hissed, twisting his arm more and pulling it behind his back, getting up close to his face, “And you knew this, didn’t you? That’s why you dressed nicely for once. You wanted to pacify me when you brought up this terrible idea! I’m not so easily bribed, Utsuro.”

“It’s not completely useless. It would be interesting for me, and having multiple degrees will make me seem even smarter to the public,” He was biting down on his lip now, hard, though he didn’t realize it, given that it was an involuntary nervous reaction.

“Stop mumbling! You expect me to believe that you have the Ichijou group’s interests at heart when you can’t even say it with confidence?” She snapped, and suddenly pushed his arm back even harder.

“Asuka, you’re hurting me!” He shouted back, actually showing some level of emotion in his voice for once, and it clearly betrayed the amount of pain he was in. And… fear, on some level.

She let go of his arm roughly, visibly fuming as she took a huffy breath, scowling as she spoke again, “You really are a disgusting little child,” while saying this she lifted her hand and gripped his hair. Not pulling on it, and she grabbed the strands very neatly, but the way she let her nails scrape his face as she did it would have given away that it was not an act of tenderness even without the accompanying words.

“I…” Isa started, but found himself scared into silence by her. She was the only person who could do this to him. Maybe that was why his father stayed with her. Masura Ichijou, trapped in the iron grip of his venomous wife. She couldn’t expect him not to have affairs with younger women than her, but she could use this power over people that she had to keep her politcal power on her plate.

“You can’t even deny it, can you, Utsuro.. dear? They keep telling me that you’re oh-so-smart, but I just don’t see it. So you can pass a few tests, that doesn’t make you a genius. If you really were as smart as people say, you’d realize that you really need to get your act together soon,” Her glare turned to a soft but condescending gaze, “What do you think would be better for the Ichijou group? A rebellious little… mess, like you… gross, not confident, and not the sort of women that the people want…” She smirked a bit, “Or… perhaps what would be better… would be the pity the voting population shows to the poor, poor candidates who recently lost their only child to a tragic… accident…” Asuka sighed, smiling as she let go of Isa’s hair, making no effort not to scratch his face again while moving her hand away, “The grieving parents, gone their precious daughter… And resolved then, to do anything they could for families if they were elected… We’re giving you a chance, Utsuro. We never needed to do that. So go ahead. Get that biology degree… but if I hear a thing about the quality of your legal work slipping, or you make another terrible decision like this… well, I do have to do what’s best for the Ichijou Group.”

Isa just stood there for a moment as she straightened up and walked away, then let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding. He slowly brought a hand up to hold his shoulder on the arm she’d twisted, and winced as the adrenaline of the situation faded and left the various pains in full focus. Aside from his shoulder and the scratches, the rest of him hurt too. It hadn’t improved at all throughout the day, and he’d been sitting most of the party. Needing to stand for so long at the end of dinner while people were leaving, then being kept standing by the lashing he’d received, hadn’t done a thing to help him. He didn’t bother pulling his phone back out, though he was sure that Tohri had sent him something in the amount of time that had taken.

He just left the room, left the house, called a cab and went back to his apartment building, the whole time staring at the blood running down his arm from where Asuka’s nails had punctured his skin. They weren’t fake nails, either. She grew them out long, then got expensive manicures that strengthened them enough they wouldn’t break, and apparently filed them into something resembling points. They were rounded. Not rounded enough. Or maybe it was just the way that she used them. Tohri had longer, more intimidating nails, but they never hurt anybody with it as far as Isa knew. It really was just Asuka. She wanted to hurt him.

After paying the taxi driver with a fifty dollar bill and walking away before the man had any chance to question it, Isa got into the elevator now that it was working again. He leaned against the wall, pressing his face against the coolness of the mirror. It was generally unstained; most of the wealthy people with grubby children lived in houses, not high-end apartments. Isa’s cheek would leave a mark on it, however; not just the usual mark of touching a mirror, but a faint bloodstain as well from the scratches that were there. Standing in this elevator felt like some sort of special hell. At this point, Isa wanted nothing but to collapse.

He couldn’t collapse yet, though. Not in the elevator. Leaning against the wall as he worked his way down the hallway once reaching his floor, he managed to get back to his apartment. Turned the knob, because as long as Tohri was home it wouldn’t be locked. They hated being awake in a locked house. Took all the danger out of life, apparently. Isa put his entire weight on the doorknob as he turned it, practically falling into the apartment. He managed to close the door behind himself, but was still leaning against it as he sunk to the floor right on the featureless welcome mat.

Tohri had heard the door, so they came running within seconds, coming to such a sudden stop when they saw Isa that they almost fell over themself, because coming to a full stop in socks on a hardwood floor was not an easy task even for the most graceful of people, which Tohri was, of course. They just stood there for a moment, then spoke quietly, “Souma…? Why are you bleeding on the floor? That’s… h-hardly good for the hardwood…” They attempted to keep some level of their usual humor, but then just frowned and dropped to their knees beside him, gently touching his cheek with the back of their hand.

“Things… didn’t go so well after dinner…” He muttered, moving the hand on his less-pained arm up to bite his knuckle nervously, but Tohri grabbed his hand and brought it back down. It was a pretty harmful nervous habit of his, so they wouldn’t allow it.

“What… what happened? Did you… tell them…?” They questioned, eyebrows furrowed and breathing quickened in worry.

“Oh, heavens no. Not that. If I ever tried to tell them that I’d be dead on the spot,” He chuckled bitterly, looking away from Tohri. He didn’t want them to see him in this state. He didn’t want them to see him… weak, “I just said that I wanted to get a second degree in biology. I… did get permission, but not without Asuka… scratching me up a bit. And dislocating my shoulder, I think. Can you put it back in place?”

“How do you expect me to do that!? I’m not a doctor!” They said, panicking, “Let me call somebo-”

“No, I have to deal with this…” Isa cut them off, wincing, “I can’t see any doctor but the family doctor, and the family doctor won’t do anything that Asuka tells him not to. Just… it’s simple. It’s been pushed out of the socket towards the back, so just, move behind me and push on my right shoulder until it pops back into place.”

“This sounds VERY risky, and as if I will only injure you further by attempting such a thing…”

“You won’t. Please, Nishikikouji. I can’t do this myself right now, and I’d rather not remain with a dislocated shoulder for much longer,” Isa spoke with just as little care in his words as always, but his voice made it clear he was in pain, and he was practically pleading at this point.

“...Very well…” Tohri relented, still worried, but moved Isa forward a bit to get behind him and do as they had been instructed. The sound when they got his shoulder back into place was a sickening one, and the grimace on his face to boot made them feel regret, but…

“Thank you,” He nodded a bit, then tried to stand up, only to find himself back on the ground in seconds and cursing under his breath, “Shit…”

“Don’t try to stand if you’re unable to!” Tohri said, a bit more harshly than they intended to, still kind of freaking out, “You know that I can lift you. Where are you trying to go?”

“I want to get out of these clothes…” Isa sighed, turning his head and looking away.

“Well, I’ll help you. I already help you in putting a binder on, so this really can’t be that much more embarrassing. I assume you want pajamas?” Tohri asked as they carefully lifted Isa up. Isa just nodded in response to their question.

-

Tohri and Isa were sitting together on the couch later that night. Isa had taken several more aspirins, though was of course careful not to take too many. It was obvious that he was still not in the best mood, however, given the fact that he was tolerating Tohri clinging to him. Something about him being small and precious and wanting to protect him. Just as obnoxious as always, basically.

They were watching Heathers, though Tohri wasn’t quite following along. English had never been their strongest subject, but Isa liked all these American movies, so they could deal with it and just watch with him. It was… nice. But they also knew one thing resolutely, which ruined their relaxation a bit. They could never let Isa meet with his family alone again. This was simply disastrous.


	5. Chapter 5

Aside from taking care of Isa, Tohri took advantage of winter break to take on a few extra hours at the restaurant where he worked. Not because they really needed more money, but it was always nice to have pocket change, and additionally nice to have something to do besides sitting around the house. Well, sitting around was a little less pathetic around Isa than it had been with their last roommate, but regardless, work was still a nice way to spend their time in a productive manner.

They were at work, but just so happened to be on break when they got a phone call. They didn’t recognize the number, but answered anyway.

“Hello?”

“Hey Nishikikouji,” The person on the other end of the phone didn’t introduce themself, but at least Tohri was able to recognize the voice enough not to be freaked out, “You have any plans for New Year’s Eve?”

“No, not yet. Why?” They asked, leaning against a wall.

“Well, if you don’t mind travelling a bit, you could come here.”

“Travelling? That means you’re home for winter break. No thanks. I don’t want anything to do with your eleven children. I am VERY MUCH not good with kids.”

“Don’t say my eleven children like I’m their parent, Nishikikouji.”

“Well, you PRACTICALLY are. You’re certainly more concerned for them than any USUAL big-brother-type would be. Don’t try to protest that, either. I know all about how you send money to them every week. And use the university computers for ENTIRELY against the rules skype calls near-daily.”

“Hey, it’s also against the rules to use skype messaging on those computers. You really want me to stop talking to you, ever?”

“Even if I did you wouldn’t. You’d get too worried. Can you believe yourself? Worrying about somebody as COLLECTED and CAPABLE as me?”

“I can completely believe myself. You absolutely should be worried about. Which is why I want you to come here for New Year’s. I’ve seen you hungover, so I intend to keep you as far away from parties as possible.”

“Listen. I will stay home and do nothing of consequence on New Year’s, if we meet up for ramen at some point this break. I can pay your train fare to the city, so don’t worry about that. It would be nice to catch up in person… WITHOUT eleven children running amok.”

“That sounds fun, on one other condition. Bring your boyfriend, I want to meet him.”

“Souma is NOT my boyfriend,” They insisted a little too loudly.

“I never mentioned Souma.”

“Shut up!”

“Never.”

“I’ll see you the day after tomorrow. Meet you at the train station. Two PM. Bye,” They hung up the phone, sighing. Their break was just about over, and they really didn’t feel like putting up with the teasing right now. Admittedly, it was their own fault; this was only payback for all the times that they’d been the one doing the teasing, but it was incredibly annoying nonetheless.

After the second half of a very long and stressful shift in which they got shouted at by customers a total of four times (once for bringing the wrong dish to the table, once for the restaurant not selling peanut butter sandwiches on the kid’s menu, once for everything being expensive, and once by a very drunk man for refusing him another drink… and apparently being a ‘rip-off waitress’ for being flat-chested.) they finally finished and got back home, walking in to see that despite it being an extra-late night, Isa was still awake, “What in the world are you still doing up?”

“Working,” He answered flatly, not even looking up from his laptop, “Is it late?”

“Yes, it’s late! INCREDIBLY late! My shift was five hours later than usual! That means it is two hours later than you usually go to sleep. It’s very important to maintain a regular sleep schedule!” They huffed, dropping their bag on the ground and going to sit next to Isa, pointing at the bottom right corner of his desktop, “And you have a clock right there!”

“Well, maybe I wanted to wait up for you,” Isa said, a slight smirk crossing his otherwise expressionless face, “Or maybe I just got caught up in this paperwork and didn’t bother checking the time. It’s not unusual for me to stay up for up to seventy-two hours on end simply because I forgot to sleep.”

“I have never witnessed this?”

“Well of course not. I haven’t really done it since you started living here, because you always snap me out of whatever focus I have with your antics,” Isa responded, looking up then closing his laptop, “And, of course, before you granted me a slight semblance of a social life, I took on far too many cases. There was always /something/ to be done, though it was really unnecessary for me to be doing so much. In any case, I’ve about finished all of the work I got for over break already… I suppose that’s convenient.”

“You finished FOUR WEEKS worth of work in only one?? Souma… how are you… like this?” They questioned, baffled once more by their friend’s (they could call him a friend by now, right?) overachievements.

“It’s just a chore. I treat it like any other chore. I get it done as soon as possible, so that I can stop caring about it. It’s really that simple. It would be four weeks of work, assuming that I did maybe five hours of it each day. I did more than that every day except for Christmas in the break so far, and got it done and over with. I guess that means I’m free for the rest of the break… not that I have anything to do with that freedom.”

“Actually! In a few days we’re taking the train into the city to get ramen with my old roommate. I’m sure that you’ll get along with him. He’s also dead inside!”

“...I see,” Isa just nodded.

“Not as dead inside as you, but pretty dead inside. He might fool you by seeming very nice and friendly… but I have seen his true self! He reacts to flirting with just as much of a deadpan response as you! And he is DARK and MYSTERIOUS!”

“Why are you so intent on me getting along with your ex-roommate? Didn’t he kick you out? Why does it matter?” Isa asked, leaning over and just lying down with his head on the arm of the couch, “Wow, two hours really can make a big difference… now that you snapped me out of my paperwork I’m exhausted. And it will be difficult to get focused on it again... How rude of you. See, it is entirely your fault that I’m so tired now.”

“HOW do you come up with these illogical logical jumps!? It’s your own fault for staying up too late. If you’re going to sleep, at least go to your room. I can’t imagine sleeping out on the couch would do anything to keep you from aches in the morning,” They sighed, shaking their head and rubbing their forehead with aggravation. Even after two months of guidance, Isa was still horrible at taking care of himself, “As for my roommate, well, he’s sort of a mother duck type of person. I want him to approve of my NEW roommate, because if he doesn’t like you then he’ll probably get all worried about me or something gross like that.”

“You managed to get yourself kicked out by somebody like that? Wow. You must actually be holding back on the obnoxious-ness with me. I didn’t actually think that was possible,” Isa muttered, yawning, “I don’t care… I’m too tired to move.”

“Must I do everything for you?” Tohri rolled their eyes as they stood up, lifting Isa with just as much ease as always and taking him to his room, putting him down on the bed with an annoyed air about them, “There. You’re not going to sleep on the couch.”

“Well actually there’s nothing that you must do for me. You just do things anyway,” He said quietly, moving just enough to pull a blanket over himself before falling asleep in moments, before Tohri could come up with another clever retort.

“That’s… that’s because you are my personal responsibility, Isa Souma…!” They stammered out despite knowing that he was already asleep. They just stood there for a few minutes before sighing softly and leaving the room, pretty exhausted themself and ready to sleep too.

-

“Oh. My. God. Uzune! Your hair!” A few days later, after a slight fiasco with Tohri yelling at the ticket guy on the train for trying to overcharge them for two people round-trip, they were at the train station and immediately commented on the most visible thing about their ex-roommate while running up to them, “It’s so bright! And wonderful! Lovely!”

“That’s an interesting sentence. Aren’t you even going to greet him?” Isa asked, trailing along behind at a much slower pace, hands deep in his pockets. Again, Tohri had insisted that he ought to take his cane with him, and again, he was reluctant to do so. Besides, today was an okay day anyhow. The pain never really went away completely, but it did vary on different levels of its dull ache, and this was one of those days where he could ignore it well enough.

“...Right. Hello, Uzune. How are you?” Tohri asked a bit sheepishly.

“I’m all right. Nice to see you haven’t changed at all, Nishikikouji,” Hitori smiled a bit, crossing his arms and chuckling, “Yeah, I decided blonde wasn’t really working for me, and since it was already bleached I figured I might as well try out an interesting color.”

“Firetruck red is definitely… interesting,” Isa raised his eyebrows, nodding a bit.

“And you must be Isa Souma!” Hitori turned to him with that warm smile still on his face, speech bright and casual, “My name’s Hitori Uzune. I’m a math major, and I used to live with this asshole till I got fed up with them.”

“Hey! That’s rude! I admit that while you most certainly DID get fed up with me, potentially for good reason, calling me ‘this asshole’ is not only disrespectful to me, but to my parents as well, who gave me the wonderful name of Tohri Nishikikouji, which should not be ignored in favor of degrading nicknames!” They shouted, waving their arms around before crossing them and leaning over, glaring at Hitori, “And don’t undersell yourself like that either! You’re not just ‘a math major’, you’re a mathematician so brilliant that the university covers your dorm fees, tuition, operation fees, textbooks…”

“Ah, Nishikikouji. He doesn’t need to know all that…” Hitori chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck and adjusting the scarf which matched the hue of his hair almost exactly. The rest of his outfit was all various grays, though, so at least there was nothing for the red to clash with.

“Nonsense! It won’t intimidate him, he’s an overachiever too!” They flipped their hair, then looked Hitori over. The scarf adjustment had drawn their attention to his outfit, “Say, that skirt looks… familiar. I don’t remember you ever wearing skirts to school, though…”

“That’s right, I don’t. I’d rather people just think of me as a guy, after all, if they have to put me into a binary gender… and a skirt just sort of ruins that, unfortunately. But yes, it should look familiar. It’s one of yours that you left behind.”

“I can see why I left it behind. It’s hideously boring. Solid gray? Ugh. Why did I ever own that,” Tohri groaned, then pointed at Hitori with one of their ridiculously sparkly nails, “You’re the only person I ever knew who could pull off a mostly gray outfit. No offense Souma,” They turned to him, “But you really did look awful in those sweatshirts. You need something that brings out the color in your eyes.”

“None taken. I don’t really care about how I look, you’re the one who decided that you should make me fashionable for some reason,” Isa shrugged, and Hitori chuckled again.

“Sounds about right,” He nodded while chuckling, turning to look up at Tohri. He was only slightly taller than Isa, so the both of them were in the company of a towering tree, more or less, “So, Nishikikouji. Should we get going?”

“Right,” Tohri nodded, turning around on a very clean pivot and making an effort to hide their annoyance. It was about then that they realized just how terrible this idea really was. Hitori and Isa, in the same place, both people who wouldn’t hesitate for a second to quell Tohri’s usual bullshit? What a nightmare… but then, they didn’t expect that they wouldn’t enjoy themself anyhow. These two WERE also their closest friends… as much as they might deny that.

“So, Souma, what are you doing right now? School? Work? I haven’t seen you around campus, so I can’t imagine that you’re enrolled at Takaba Uni, so I’m guessing you’ve got important family, to be living in town?”

“You’re certainly observant. I can imagine you’d be very good at telling lies,” Isa responded nonchalantly, finding this to be acceptable small talk. Hitori just… giggled, a bit, at that statement before Isa continued, “You’re correct, anyway. My parents have a lot of money and a lot of influence. I’m working right now, in law. I’m looking to enroll in a biology major at Takaba University soon, however.”

“Ah! Souma, you could easily get into an even better school-” Tohri began to protest, but was cut off by a raised hand and further words.

“I’m only being allowed to pursue the degree at all on a very thin string. Going to Takaba University is an easy way to reassure my mother that I don’t really care. Regardless of how much I do care, as far as she’s concerned the only purpose for me to do this is to seem smarter, not out of any genuine interest. I’m only lucky that the nearest school to where I’m living is one that’s best known for its science programs.”

“So you’re not going to Takaba just to spend more time with Nishikikouji?” Hitori joked, “Pity. That would have been really romantic.”

“Romantic? Pray tell, what gives you the impression that my interactions with Nishikikouji consist of anything other than tolerating their terrible personality?”

“Oh, I see. Well in that case, I think that you and I are going to get along just fine, Souma,” Hitori nodded, elbowing Isa a bit, though gently.

“Excuse me, but I AM standing right here. It’s very rude to speak not only behind somebody’s back, but directly behind it!” Tohri added in, putting a hand on their hip.

“I’m not trying to talk behind your back I just happen to be behind you. I don’t care at all if you hear me calling your personality terrible, you already know how I feel about you.”

“...This is true, but it still feels like a personal attack to hear the both of you talking about how much I annoy you…” They crossed their arms now and slumped their shoulders, only to immediately go back to a better posture, because slouching was just unattractive.

“We’re bonding, Nishikikouji. We found a shared interest. Being annoyed by you,” Hitori chuckled again, but then frowned a bit, “But… if it really is bothering you, then we’ll stop. I never can tell if you’re just putting up your usual drama or if something is actually getting to you.”

“For somebody who’s so open about their emotions you are awfully hard to read, Nishikikouji,” Isa added on with a nod, “At least I’m consistent. If I act like I usually do, it’s none of your concern, and if I actually show an emotional response to something, it’s incredibly serious.”

“That isn’t exactly being emotionally open! Only showing any sort of response at all when it gets to a point that you can’t stand not to… it’s impossible to tell what you’re thinking! And both of you do it, too! Dealing with both of you at once is like a tag team of INSUFFERABLE!” They scoffed, turning their nose up, “Listening to you talk about my insufferability is admittedly not so bad, but having to put up with both of your ridiculously uncooperative behavior patterns is something that’s actually bound to stress me out! Do you want to give me wrinkles??”

Isa just looked away silently in response to this, all three of them now standing still in the middle of the sidewalk. People with places to be just pushed past them without a second thought, unaffected by the tension in the air. Hitori, unlike Isa, continued smiling just as much as always and gave a response, “Eh? Nishikikouji, I’m afraid I haven’t the faintest idea what you’re talking about…”

“You do too. Don’t play dumb with me, Uzune. At least Isa will admit that he’s hiding his feelings,” They pointed at him, and he just nodded, “You… I never even knew I was making you uncomfortable until you told me to leave. And I know that you’ve been keeping something from me. I know that you were hiding something back then, too. I never asked you because you always seem so HAPPY, but just seeing the two of you interact with each other acting like you’re both completely fine and functional human beings? That makes it really obvious.”

“Nishikikouji, you’re just jumping to conclusions,” Hitori shook his head, still smiling, “What could possibly be wrong? I’m completely fine. Let’s get to the ramen shop, right?”

“You are good at lying. But… not good enough,” Isa whispered, just loud enough for Hitori to hear him, “I get it, though. We’re in public. I’m here. If you were going to tell Nishikikouji the truth, it certainly wouldn’t be here.”

“No… no, I guess that there’s not exactly any better time anyway,” Hitori sighed, and his face fell, “You ever… felt like such an utter failure, that it’s not even worth trying anymore?”

“No, I can’t say that I have,” Tohri said bluntly, and the now clearly-fake smile returned to Hitori’s face, and he nodded slowly.

“Right… sorry. Let’s pretend that I never said anything, right? I’m… I’m gonna go. You two can go on ahead without me. Don’t let me ruin your day, have fun!” He waved as he left, sounding for all the world like nothing was wrong, but something about watching him leave dug a deep pit in Tohri’s stomach, and they could only describe what filled it as regret.

“Nice going, Nishikikouji…” Isa muttered, glaring up at them, but that was all he would say on the matter unless further prompted. Tohri’s face made it clear they knew full well that they’d messed up, and now it seemed that they might not ever find out what Hitori was talking about. Worrying as all hell, of course, but he was right. They shouldn’t just give up on the whole trip and go home.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t all that fun. The food was good, of course, but Tohri was quiet for once in their life, and Isa wasn’t about to break that silence which only came once in a thousand years.


	6. Chapter 6

It was a few days before Hitori messaged Tohri again. Maybe that was just how long it took him to get to the library to use skype, but then again, that wasn’t the most likely cause given what had happened when they last saw eachother. He did, though. Eventually.

● Hey. Sorry I was acting so weird the other day.  
○ NO do not apologize Im the one who messed up and I should be the one saying sorry  
● Well. Yeah, kind of.  
○ I am SO sorry about that it was INCREDIBLY insensitive of me  
● It’s not a big deal. I don’t know why I expected any differently of you.  
○ I… really am bad at this  
● Glad to see you’re finally admitting it. You have good intentions but you’re seriously awful at acting on them.  
○ I understand what I did wrong the other day, at least  
● Oh?  
○ I invalidated your problems with my response, an EXTREMELY INCONSIDERATE move. Just because I dont have any problems with my self esteem doesnt mean that was a good time to say it  
● Yeah basically. And, well, if you really are that self-confident you probably wouldn’t understand anyway.  
○ So I squandered away my only chance to learn what ails you  
● Yes.  
○ I suppose I cant blame you for that… but, if it gets to a certain point, please ask for help  
● What do you mean?  
○ Drastic changes in appearance are a warning sign for suicide, you know  
● My hair dye? That’s just because I felt like changing things up. Really, I’m fine.  
○ Okay but if you end up NOT FINE dont do anything rash please PLEASE ask for help first it doesnt have to be me but dont try and deal with it all on your own youre not alone hitori  
● Wow. You’ve really got your panties in a knot now. I told you, I’m fine. You don’t have to worry.  
○ Promise me that if it gets worse you will ask for help PROMISE ME THAT  
● And you say I’m overprotective. Fine, I promise.  
○ I am not overprotective I just dont want to lose the people that I care about  
● Aw, you care about me. How sweet.  
○ I AM BEING SERIOUS!! even if you did kick me out of our dorm that does not change the fact that you play an important role in my life! You are nonetheless my friend  
● I know. I guess I do care about you too. At least, I want you to be safe and happy. You and Souma both, actually.  
○ Huh?  
● All I can hope for you is a future where you can both be happy. Really, I think you both deserve that.  
○ Thats more for Souma than for me  
● Yeah. He’s a pretty sad guy, it seems to me.  
○ You would be correct in that assumption but JUST YOU WATCH as I DRASTICALLY IMPROVE HIS LIFE I have already begun  
● The way you capitalize that makes you sound like some sort of sleight-of-hand magician hyping up a disappearing act. If engineering doesn’t work out for you, that’d be a good career path.  
○ no it would not  
● It absolutely would.  
○ Im leaving  
● That’s fair.

“Huh,” Isa noted softly as Tohri exited skype (a long and arduous process) and they jumped half out of their chair at the noise.

“Souma!! How long have you been reading over my shoulder? That is an INCREDIBLY rude thing to do!” They protested, pushing against the desk and glaring at him. 

“A while,” He shrugged, leaning casually on the desk himself and messing with one of Tohri’s knicknacks. Some sort of small abstract art sculpture that they’d put on the desk despite the desk not belonging to them, “Long enough to see that you’re just as obnoxious when it comes to the safety of your other friends. Here I thought I was special. Turns out you’re not just a drama queen, but a total worrier too. Maybe that’s why you and Uzune clashed so much. You both worry in different ways.”

“I am NOT a worrier, I just want to look out for my friends!” They insisted, crossing their arms and looking away with a huff.

“Sure. You worried about me before you even met me, so you can’t exactly make that excuse.”

“Well,” They seemed slightly flustered, but then composed themself and stood up with a grand flourish of their hand, “THAT is because you are trans, Isa Souma! It is my personal prerogative to keep an eye out for my brethren! It was /I/ who drove the down with cis bus!”

“The what now?” Isa asked, staring at Tohri’s theatrics entirely nonplussed.

“It is a joke from the internet,” They sighed as they sat back down, pouting somewhat.

“So… a meme.”

“ ...Yes,” They agreed reluctantly, nodding, then took another glance at Isa, “Hold on just one moment. You’re dressed. And not binding. Where are you going?”

“You know where,” Isa sighed, shifting uncomfortably. He was back to his original habit of wearing his large winter coat over his clothing, which was, at least today, nothing special. He’d just thrown on a pair of slacks and another one of the blouses from his mother before concealing the whole outfit with a tightly zippered wool coat. He’d only even bothered to dress that way at all on the off chance he’d end up needing to take his coat off. Asuka might not be pleased with the pants, but at least the blouse should deflect her wrath, and it wasn’t like he planned to bring up any touchy topics this time.

“God, no,” Tohri frowned, looking disgusted, “Bad plan. Just stay here. I could use some company, I gave Uzune my word that I wouldn’t go out and get drunk on New Year’s. He knows I get real nasty hangovers if I drink, so he told me not to.”

“I have to go. If I’ve been invited to an event of theirs, there’s no turning it down. Especially considering how many eggshells I’m walking on right now with the whole bio degree thing.”

“I don’t want you to go, though…” They whined, then placed a hand on Isa’s cheek gently, “The scratches from last time are still healing! You can’t possibly-”

“Nishikikouji,” Isa frowned, grabbing their wrist, “Getting out of this is not an option for me. You can’t convince me otherwise, because I already know I don’t want to go. I just have to.”

“Fine. If you really must go, then take me with you,” They said, glaring right into Isa’s eyes, bringing their other hand up to hold onto his face as if HE was the one who would currently be an idiot sandwich, and not Tohri, who was consistently one.

“I thought you said you couldn’t go out for New Year’s,” Isa responded simply, not even reacting to the ridiculous grip on his face.

“No. I just can’t get DRUNK. There’s a difference,” Tohri assured him with a peculiar intensity.

“Well, meeting my parents will drive you to drink, so…” Isa rolled his eyes, and glanced away. Only glanced, because he couldn’t exactly turn his head with Tohri holding onto his face like this.

“CONTRARY to what you may believe, I am in fact capable of tolerating bad behavior of their sort. No, not… tolerating, but tuning out at least. If I had outbursts over every little thing while at work, well, I wouldn’t have the job anymore! My dramatics are reserved only for those who can handle them!” Isa had a hard time believing that Tohri could ever truly curb their drama, but they did have a point when it came to their job; surely they must be mildly capable of acting like a normal human being for short periods of time, to have held down a job at a restaurant for as long as they had. Especially a restaurant in a town like this, where a good percentage of the patronage was bound to be exactly the same sort of snooty upper-class as Isa’s parents.

“Fine. Just don’t cause a scene in any way, shape, or form. If you do, I’m the one who’s going to get in trouble for it,” Isa muttered, and Tohri let go of his face.

“I won’t, don’t worry. I have the common sense to only cause a scene when /I’m/ the one who’ll be worse off for it. At least, I do try. Let’s say what happened with Uzune was just a… blip in my judgment. Besides, it wasn’t really the scene that caused the issue,” They shrugged, then took a step backwards and held out their arms, “I’m guessing that I’ll be fine, but is this a suitable outfit?”

“Mostly,” Isa nodded as he looked them over. They did have good fashion sense, for the most part… excluding the weeks leading up to and directly following certain ‘fashion walk’ events, in which they kept up with all the most abstract of trends, “Just… lose the… half cape…?” He wasn’t even sure what to call it. The real issue wasn’t that; there were loads of clothing items that he didn’t know the actual name for. The problem was that it was leopard-print.

“...Right. This is a bit gaudy for politicians,” They agreed, shockingly enough, and set the cape on the back of the chair they’d been sitting in until recently, then walking over to the door and slipping on their ‘casual heels’, also known as the only ones that didn’t have heels as long as their entire foot. Or longer. They were actually quite classy. Perfect for the situation, “Well then, shall we go to Hell?”

Isa shrugged, then checked his watch, “We can stretch it five more minutes.”

“You…” Tohri hesitated for a moment, frowning and furrowing their brow, “Did you just… check a watch? You’re wearing a watch for something outside of fashion reasons, and entirely unironically? How come I’ve never seen you do that before?”

“I usually have my phone out, so I don’t actually need to check the time,” He explained, dropping his arm to his side, “I’ve always worn a watch for timekeeping reasons, but smartphones have made it mildly obsolete… it’s still convenient sometimes, though.”

“I see…” They nodded slowly, crossing their arms and leaning back against the wall, “Hey, Souma?”

“Yes?”

“You ever see The Breakfast Club? I know you like those American movies, after all. I can’t say I understood a lot of it, but back when I lived with Uzune he borrowed my laptop to do something called a rabbitcast with his siblings back home, and the older ones watched it. Apparently it’s one of them’s favorite movie… anyway, have you?”

“...Yes. Why?”

“Maybe I didn’t understand a lot of it, and the others watching it seemed to just think of it as a comedy, but one bit stood out to me.”

“The part about becoming your parents?”

“How did you know?”

“Well, that’s the only line in it I could think that you’d link to me,” He frowned, looking down at the ground, “I’d like to think that isn’t true, though.”

“So would I. But…” They sighed, looking up at the ceiling. There wasn’t much space between them and it. Their head tended to brush against it often, in their taller heels, “I feel like, if you keep letting them push you around like this, you’ll give in eventually. Isn’t that true? The way you talk about it, makes it seem inevitable that you’re only putting off following in their footsteps. That you will someday. That you’ll never get to be Isa Souma. That you’ll always be expected to be Utsuro Ichijou after all.”

“You’re completely correct,” Isa nodded, clenching his fists as he stared at the ground.

“Why don’t we change that?” They asked, now practically whispering.

“How?”

“I was asked to go work on a Takaba Uni graduate’s study, because I’m doing so well in my classes and they don’t have nearly enough engineers over there. It’s on an island that’s technically in international waters, something about being a top secret project… so I don’t think you’d be found, if you were to, say, come with me,” Their voice was still hushed, worried, almost nervous. Something rare from Tohri Nishikikouji.

“I… don’t think a top secret research study would be all too willing to let you bring a plus one,” Isa chuckled, then shook his head, brushing off the conversation as something casual despite it being distinctly not so, “Besides, Masura holds onto my passport. My parents think the only traveling I should be doing is with them. Anyway, we should probably get going.”

“Right,” They nodded, shot down but not discouraged. In fact, they seemed almost more determined than before as they started walking out with Isa, “But you know, I’ll find a way. You’re coming with me whether you like it or not, or else I’m not going at all. You should know by now that there’s NO WAY I am ever leaving you to fend for yourself again.”

“Except that there is, Nishikikouji. You can’t expect to look out for me our entire lives, because we have completely different paths. You were absolutely right when you said that someday I’d have to give up on my individuality, and yet, you’re the type of person who will never give up on yours. We were always going to part ways eventually. This seems to be that time. Well, when you leave for this research thing,” Isa sounded almost upset as he said this. Almost, but he actually offered Tohri a soft smile as they got into the elevator, “But, I must admit. Time spent with you is a… slight improvement on my life otherwise.”

“... Isa…” Tohri spoke gently, leaning down and pulling him into a tight hug. Not tight enough to hurt him, but certainly nowhere near loose either, “That’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me… How am I supposed to accept leaving after you say something like THAT?”

“I’m sure you’ll manage, Tohri. Come on, we need to get over to the party,” Isa said quietly, and there was silence between them for the entire cab ride, though it was broken upon arrival when they walked in and were greeted by Isa’s parents, “Hey. Masura, Asuka, this is my stylish friend I was mentioning before. Tohri Nishikikouji.”

“Hm… it’s a, pleasure, to meet you, Miss Nishikikouji…” Asuka raised her eyebrows as she slowly accepted the introduction, then leaned down next to Isa and whispered loudly in his hear, “She’s awfully tall… I heard that people have a habit of liking people who are similar to their parents… you best not be partaking in any… /lesbian/ activities, with this woman, Utsuro…”

“Asuka, of course I’m not. Even if there was any chance of that, I know that would be far too scandalous, and as an Ichijou, I have a reputation to uphold,” He smiled sarcastically, but his words were… sincere /enough/ to pass his mother’s scrutiny.

“Oi, you’re also awful flat-chested, Nishikikouji. You sure you’re not some sort of cross-dressing pervert?” Masura asked, in a joking tone, though his words were really quite rude.

“Oh, Mr. Ichijou, I am certain. If you need me to, I can prove it,” Tohri smirked, raising one eyebrow and putting a hand on their hip.

“That… won’t be necessary,” Asuka said, shaking her head and backing off. So that was how it was, huh? Of course her nasty child would have nasty friends, but this particular nasty friend was a mild threat. As much as she was aware of his infidelity, she still didn’t appreciate when other people made eyes at her husband, particularly not women /this/ young, “Stop being rude, Masura, dear.”

“All right,” He groaned and walked off to socialize with other guests, because of course, that was what every Ichijou party had to be about. Socializing, networking, making connections. Asuka did similarly, but kept giving the stink eye to Tohri whenever she saw them. In her eyes, they were a /sexual deviant/ who was after both her husband /and/ her daughter, because Asuka Ichijou had to expect and see the worst in everyone. She couldn’t just give her child’s friend a /chance/.

In any case, however, eventually enough people were drunk and preoccupied that Tohri’s presence was really of no consequence. They weren’t drinking, as they /had/ promised Hitori they’d avoid getting hungover on New Years. Actually, they couldn’t really remember drinking any alcohol except for maybe one occasionally at dinner since moving in with Isa. They never really wanted to bail on him to go to any college parties, though they knew he would neither mind nor care. Regardless, the truth stood that they hadn’t been hungover in quite a while, and they were glad for that fact. They /did/ have nasty hangovers. So they didn’t mind not drinking anything, but… That didn’t mean they wouldn’t do something else that they probably shouldn’t.

Isa wasn’t drinking either, but he did get unfortunately caught up in some political conversations, and thus lost track of where Tohri was. He had just barely managed to get away from the talk of oil-based land-wars when he found his wrist grabbed, unmistakably bedazzled nails clacking against each other as the owner dragged him off into a corner, grinning.

“What’s this about?” Isa asked, reclaiming his hand and brushing off his shoulder where one of the (many) taller people had dropped crumbs on him by accident, “You pulled me away from a /very/ engrossing discussion on the status of the country’s economy.”

“...Sure. Anyway!” Their grin got even wider, “I have a surprise for you!” They pulled something out of their pocket, and held it up. Without his glasses, Isa had to squint and take a step backwards to see it, as Tohri had held it right in front of his face. He was supposed to wear contacts around his family rather than glasses, but he wasn’t coordinated enough to put them in, so he couldn’t.

“Is that… My passport…?” Isa questioned, raising an eyebrow as he looked up at Tohri.

“Yeah!! I told you I would find a way to take you with me!” They winked, putting the passport back in their pocket.

“But how did you…” He asked, sincerely baffled.

“Let’s just say that I can be very convincing, and your father can be very convinced,” They shrugged, “But that’s not important! What is important is that we’re both going to go work at Takaba Labs. I’m sure they’ll recognize your skills and let you join them too! We leave on February fourteenth.”


	7. Chapter 7

“Welcome, new recruits!” A tall and fairly gruff looking man spoke with a degree of seriousness, then immediately devolved into a fit of giggles. Isa Souma had never seen such a large person giggle, but it was definitely something that everyone should see at least once in their life. The dissonance between broad shoulders and a tinny laugh was one that even the stodgiest people would find at least a little entertaining, “I always wanted to say that! But uh, don’t worry! Here at Takaba Labs, the employee comes first! That’s right! It’s not like other stressful jobs that you have to go to even when you aren’t feeling well, because you want to save your sick days! If you have been selected to work here, we already know you can be trusted not to just slack off all the time!”

“Well, more or less… Though most of you were plucked straight from Takaba Uni or other Takaba Lab projects to work here,” He turned and leaned in close to Isa, who took a step backwards, “You, Mr. Souma, were picked by recommendation, based on your stupendous performance in the scientific forum that I run, despite lacking a background in biology, so you /will/ have to eewoowoo a couple of frogs before you’re considered a full and valuable team member. I’m sure for somebody with so much book knowledge, that won’t be an issue!”

“Sir?” Tohri questioned, hand raised in the air.

“Yes?” The man questioned as he stood up straight again to be closer to eye level with Tohri. They were taller than him, but they were much more like a rail and he was a lot more like a brick house. As soon as he’d moved away Isa took one more step backwards, biting the inside of his cheek and turning his gaze to the floor.

“What in the world is an eewoowoo?” They asked, and some of the others turned to look at them with a sort of shocked indignance at the casual nature with which they had asked that question, in a tone which practically left it the same as saying ‘I demand to know’. However, the man seemed completely unfazed by this phrasing.

“Oh! You’re an engineer, so of course you wouldn’t know. To ‘eewoowoo’ something is to give it an additional, functional orifice, usually a mouth and usually placed on the opposite side of the head, so as to utilize the same esophagus as the original mouth!” He explained, and Tohri only hesitated, then nodded slowly, though somebody else made a groaning sound, causing the first negative reaction out of him, “Hey! If you’re going to react like that to such an interesting science experiment, you may as well leave right now! I understand seeing things outside of your department as odd and confusing, but don’t act so disgusted!”

“That’s… pretty gross, though,” The person who’d groaned spoke now, sheepishly, “And… probably uncomfortable, and illegal!”

“Illegal?” The man questioned, looking very puzzled before guffawing and shaking his head, “Oh, silly! That’s why we’re on international waters, after all! Bioethics, actually, any science-related ethics whatsoever are an absolutely moot point here! Not that we’re going to, but if we needed to slowly poison a whole plague of rats and let them die painfully, choking out their last breaths in a filthy cage… well, we could do that with no issues whatsoever! That’s what’s so great about a lab outside of the laws! Now, we aren’t going to be testing on any humans unless they happen to volunteer, but aside from that, anything goes in the name of progress!”

“Sir, I’m not sure that-” That same person started, but was cut off.

“Okay, hold on a minute! All seven of you! Raise your hand if you are completely comfortable with the lack of ethics that I just described to you!” He said just as cheerfully as he had before. Isa and Tohri were the only people to raise hands, and Isa gave his friend a bit of an odd look, not quite expecting that response, “Okay! You two, you’re staying! I like the looks of you… boys?” He looked confused as he glanced over Tohri, then shrugged, “Eh, the rest of you should just go back home. Don’t worry, we’ll pay all the travel expenses and arrange jobs for you at some /other/ Takaba-owned lab.”

The five who hadn’t raised their hands stood awkwardly for a moment before shuffling off, out of the room, and the man turned once more to his two remaining charges, “So, you two…”

“Oh, by the way, Sir, I’m not a boy. Isa Souma here is, but I, Tohri Nishikikouji, happen to walk a fine and elevated tightrope above that swirling pit which is gender confusion,” They spoke, still as casual as they had before. Almost like they’d met this man before.

“Tohri… Nishikikouji…?” The man questioned, then a huge smile broke across his face as he stepped closer, “Well! So it is you! I can’t believe I didn’t recognize you… then again, last time I saw you, you were a bit shorter… and you had breasts… so it actually is quite a change!”

“The very same, Sir.”

“Oh, none of that with me! We go way back, Nishikikouji! At the very least, call me Kawara!”

“...Kawara?” Isa spoke up again, “You mean, as in… Ryuuji Kawara? The head of this project?”

“That’s me! I should have realized… did you know, Souma, that your recommendation was only even considered because of my previous meeting with Nishikikouji? They won a contest in their first year of high school and were supposed to meet with one of Takaba’s top engineers… but some bloke entered it as a biology contest, so instead of that, they got to meet with an idiot who couldn’t tell them the first thing about gears and… whatever else is involved in engineering!”

“You’re still so clueless when it comes to other departments? Wow. I may have changed a lot, but you haven’t changed one bit!” Tohri rolled their eyes, putting one hand on their hip and picking underneath their nails with their thumb on the other hand, “Shocking, how many people are so willing to let a few silly /moral qualms/ get in the way of scientific progress…”

“Yes, well… better to separate the… the something from the chaff early on, don’t you think? And of course, it’s you and your recommendation who stick around… It’s only prodigies like you who truly understand the meaning of discovery!”

“I do try to be a good person, but not when it gets in the way of other goals… And Souma here, well, I just don’t think that he’s a good person in the first place.”

“Nishikikouji, that’s not a very nice thing to say about your friend!” Ryuuji pouted.

“Oh, no, it’s fine. It’s completely true,” Isa added in his two cents, “I really couldn’t care less about bioethics. Whatever needs to be done, right?”

“Souma would probably kill somebody just so he could perform an autopsy! Ah, but aside from that, he is fairly precious so do be nice to him, won’t you Kawara?”

“Of course! I’m thinking that the three of us are going to get along really well!” Ryuuji grinned, “If you ever want to all meet up for lunch, or for dinner after work, don’t hesitate! Please don’t be intimidated by my position, it’s really just a title… My project doesn’t even have priority over any other projects being conducted in this lab! I’m just in charge, for some reason.”

“It’s because you’re brilliant, of course. You certainly /could/ make your own project higher priority, I’m sure… after all, you were able to get Souma here despite him having no professional background in sciences.”

“This is true… I have a lot of power here, but I don’t really like thinking about it! Anyway, why don’t you two get back to your apartment? You’re rooming together, right?”

“Correct!” Tohri nodded, then leaned down to put an arm around Isa’s shoulder, “I don’t know how this kid ever managed to live alone…”

“Kid? Nishikikouji, I’m not even a whole year younger than you…” He muttered.

“Details, details. In any case, you’re right! We’ll need to be well-rested when we start work tomorrow, especially since Souma is going to need to perform some… what did you call them, again?”

“Hah, I’d think somebody with a name like yours would remember! Eewoowoo,” Ryuuji answered simply, grinning.

“Right. Eewoowoo,” Tohri nodded, “In any case, will we see you tomorrow, Kawara?”

“That’s right, you will! I’ll see you then! Bye!” He waved goofily as his only remaining recruits walked out of the door.

Tohri and Isa remained quiet until they got back to the singular apartment building attached to the research facility, the two buildings taking up most of the island. Add in the one restaurant, and there was only a little natural space left over. Once getting inside the apartment, Isa sighed, visibly relaxing as he leaned against the wall. Tohri gave him an odd look, “Souma? What was making you so tense?”

“Ryuuji Kawara…” He muttered, turning away.

“What about him? Just the fact that we met him? We’ll be seeing a lot of him! Despite being in charge, he’s very friendly and generally unprofessional, after all… you can’t go freaking out every time you see him just because he’s got a big position…” They rolled their eyes, going to sit down at a chair in the kitchen, trying to get used to the new layout.

“No, I mean… that’s not it. I’m not really intimidated by his position…”

“Hold on. Hold on just one second,” They stood back up again, shock across their face, “Oh my God. Oh my GOD. I never thought this possible!”

“What?”

“I just… Souma! I never really took you for the sort of person to have a crush!”

“Is that what they call it?” He questioned, shrugging, “I guess, maybe a little bit. He’s attractive, is all. And… scientific.”

“Nerd,” They snickered, “THAT is what you find attractive in a person? Science?”

“Well I mean. He looks like he has good muscles, too.”

“ISA SOUMA, this is SO SURREAL!”

“Not really. I just sort of like our boss. Not a big deal at all.”


	8. Chapter 8

Early the next morning, Isa Souma was woken up by the sound of stomping feet, immediately followed by his name being shouted in a very familiar tone by a very familiar voice. However, being /woken up/ by these things was an entirely new and equally unpleasant experience. Opening his eyes revealed the owner of these sounds to be standing in the doorway, fully dressed with their hands on their hips and disapproval on their face.

“What do you want…?” Isa groaned, turning over to look at the clock on the nightstand. Three hours till they had to get to work, and it wasn’t like they had a long commute. He could have gotten at least one more hour of sleep if not for the wake-up call from Hell.

“Now that I have gotten over my shock and surprise, and had the time to think it over, I have made a decision! I do not want you to pursue a relationship with Ryuuji Kawara!” They spoke sharply, moving one hand to point at Isa while keeping the other on their hip.

“...Well it’s not like I was going to. Why?” He questioned, sitting up and grabbing his glasses from next to the clock, adjusting them on his face to squint at Tohri scrutinously.

“Well, he’s like thirty, for one thing!” Their reasoning was the most lackluster thing about them.

“So? You slept with my dad…” He muttered, standing up then shivering a bit as his feet touched the wood… he’d have to get a rug. His bedroom in his last apartment had been much more pleasantly carpeted.

“That was only to get YOUR passport, and was an entirely passionless and loveless encounter! In any case, besides his age, Ryuuji Kawara is also YOUR BOSS. It is one of the primary rules of social conformity that you do not romantically pursue your employer! Dare I say it may even be rule number one of living a proper and good life in relation to other people!”

“I thought rule number one was ‘don’t kill people’,” Isa muttered as he opened his closet, “Regardless, it isn’t as if he would be /interested/ in me, so I don’t believe you have to worry about it, Nishikikouji. Now, why don’t you help me put my binder on and we’ll go get some breakfast? Since you woke me at such an unsavory hour, the least you can do is get me food during the oodles of extra time we’re going to have…”

“You’d be surprised the people who Ryuuji Kawara is attracted to…” They mumbled, stepping closer, “Ah, but in any case, he’s married too! So every single sign points to it being a bad idea, to hook up with him. So you best listen to me, Isa Souma!” They insisted, then their tone got a bit softer, “You… aren’t supposed to bind for more than eight hours, you know. Putting it on now would mean two and a half extra hours, on top of a seven hour workday... Why don’t I just bring you something back from the restaurant?”

“No. I want to go to breakfast,” He said simply, turning to glare at Tohri, “An extra hour and a half isn’t going to hurt me much more than binding with chronic pain does, anyway. I can’t just scrap any idea of a social life because I have to pass in my daily life now…”

“Fine,” They groaned, leaning down and helping him, “You know, the labs here have everything, I’ll snatch you some hormones if you want… Or if you’d rather keep your waifish complexion, we can skip that, but you should at least get top surgery so you aren’t suffocating every day! I could even get you the guy who did mine! He doesn’t have a medical license, but he’s very reliable! His name’s Alphonse, and last I knew he was still living in Japan, but he’s actually been here before… it’s where he got his training!” They finished zipping up the binder, then already had their phone out.

“I don’t need to hear all about some underground doctor-”

“Well, he prefers being called a cosmetic surgeon… he’s very good! I got a coupon for a free facelift when I got my surgery done, and I’ll probably use it once I get a bit older and less naturally gorgeous…” They were dialing the number.

“Nishikikouji. Stop,” He demanded sharply, turning and crossing his arms, “I’ve already decided. It’s entirely likely that my parents /will/ find out where I am and what I’m doing. If they do, my only chance at survival would be to actually… begin a political campaign, as Utsuro Ichijou. I still can’t make any permanent changes to myself, as much as I’d like to.”

“The chances that you’ll be found are positively microscopic! If they’re looking for you, they’re searching for a woman named Utsuro Ichijou, in the United States of America. That’s where the records say that we went, after all. Simply by being yourself and being employed at a place like this, you’ve made a perfectly clean getaway from the evils of personal bureaucracy!” Tohri reassured him, but he kept staring at the far wall blankly.

“You’d be surprised the sort of things that the Ichijou group can accomplish,” He said softly, rolling his hands on the legs of his pajama pants and sending tiny bits of fluff that still had enough individuality to distinguish themselves from lint towards the chilly floor, “I honestly wouldn’t put it past them, to find me even here… I’d say there’s an eighty percent chance I’ll be found eventually. The real question is will I live, will they send somebody to kill me, or will my mother murder me with her very own hands…?”

“...Isa,” Tohri whispered, crouching down and setting a hand against his cheek, a softness in their eyes as they met his. The only person who’d never been the slightest bit intimidated by those violet eyes, “I won’t ever let them… I won’t let anybody hurt you again, okay?”

“Don’t make promises like that…” He muttered in response, “You always say things like that, but it’s not possible. I’m going to get hurt. Promising only makes you feel liable regardless of your actual involvement, and I’d really prefer not to be a source of guilt for you. If I were the cause, then I’d have to put up with your complaining…”

“Well, in any case, they aren’t going to find you here! If you do get hurt again, it isn’t going to be by them! As soon as we left Japan, they were out of your life completely! It’s over!” They reassured him, and he just shrugged, but that was good enough for now.

Once ready, the pair of them left the apartment building and went down to the singular restaurant. It wasn’t all that large, giving most of its space to a kitchen big enough to suit its widely variable menu. Which was fine; it just needed to feed a certain number of scientists, some of whom every single day if they didn’t feel like cooking for themselves ever. They got a booth, sitting down across from each other and ordering drinks right away. Coffee for Isa, hot chocolate for Tohri. How they could possibly wake up so much consistently earlier than Isa and function with such a low level of caffeine was an eternal mystery.

Before even getting the chance to order food, the two were interrupted in their idle chatter by a boisterous and familiar voice, “Ah!! Nishikikouji! Isa Souma! Fancy seeing you here!” Ryuuji Kawara was by himself, and started to sit down in the booth next to Tohri, though a disapproving glare on their part led him to gingerly stand back up and sit next to Isa instead… Although, the glare never went away. 

“Well, there IS a limited amount of space on this island on international waters. It’s only to be expected that we’ll see each other around… Wouldn’t you prefer to sit with your friends?” Tohri asked, raising their eyebrows.

“Whaaat?? Ah, but you’re both my friends too! Especially you, Nishikikouji! We’ve known each other for so long, after all!” Ryuuji pouted slightly, “You’re not STILL mad at me, are you? I mean, I got your boyfriend a job for you…”

“B-boyfriend!?” Tohri stammered, glancing at Isa then shaking their head.

“Yeah, we aren’t dating,” Isa deadpanned, then looked up at Ryuuji, who was sitting next to him, “Both completely single. They’re just an obnoxious friend of mine, getting me this job to make up for freeloading off of me for several months, uninvited.”

“Aw, how sweet. You called me your friend,” Tohri chuckled a bit, but then shot another look at Ryuuji, who adjusted his collar awkwardly and looked off to the side, “And you, Kawara… I will certainly maintain polite workplace relations with you! However! You are not forgiven, as I am precisely the sort of person to hold a grudge. That isn’t to say we cannot be friends, but watch your step!”

“What happened between you?” Isa asked, leaning forward on the table. A pointed look at Tohri proved that part of his curiosity was wondering if there was an ulterior motive behind the request that he not romantically pursue their boss.

“Nothing!” Both of them answered simultaneously, tones immediately falling to defense.

“...Sure,” Isa shrugged, sitting up straight again, “Well, I don’t mind if Mr. Kawara sits with us. I don’t think I will be making many friends, so it’s not like we’ll miss out on any friendly meals just between us… and any other concerns you may have Nishikikouji, I really don’t think you have to worry about.”

“That’s right!” Ryuuji nodded, grinning widely, “Anything that happened, that’s all in the past now, and it’s never going to happen again! I definitely learned my lesson! Cross my heart!”

“And hope to die?” Tohri rolled their eyes, finishing off the childish phrase.

“Eh… I wouldn’t quite go that far!” He shook his head, then turned to Isa, who was bound to be a bit friendlier, “Hey, you have to try the pancakes here! They’re really, really good! Trust me! I’ve gotten them for breakfast so many times…”

“Well, this is a very extensive menu…” Isa muttered as he looked through it, “Even just for breakfast… you’d have to be a very picky eater to get the same thing any number of times that could be considered ‘so many’... But I suppose I may as well try them.”

“I’m not a picky eater! Not at all!” Ryuuji shook his head, “The pancakes are just so good that it’s hard to convince myself to even try anything else on the menu! When I do, it’s all really good, but just can’t compare to a nice pancake covered in syrup, with some fruit on top…” He seemed to be drooling.

“I see…” Isa nodded slowly, but smiled a bit. Strange, for him, and Tohri fumed slightly. He was clearly in way too deep, crushing on Ryuuji like this, and their disapproval was obvious.

-

Weeks passed in a rather similar fashion; Isa and Ryuuji would occasionally spend time together while Tohri was the most spiteful third wheel in history, their bitter glares keeping the flirting to a minimum between those two… however, the fact that there was any flirting happening in the first place wasn’t exactly something that they would consider to be good in any way, shape, or form. In fact, they might even go so far as to call it Bad, with a capital B. Isa was eighteen… no, he’d mentioned being nineteen now, though he’d never said when his birthday was. Regardless, Ryuuji was twenty-seven, and that was still eight years of difference. Three years ago, an eight year difference would have been a terrfiying and awful thing, and Tohri was not so willing to let go of their qualms.

“You’re going to visit your family this weekend, right?” Isa asked, looking up from his laptop suddenly one evening while Tohri tinkered with a pile of scrap metal on the floor, sitting criss-cross in a pair of silk pajamas with a fuzzy bathrobe layered on top. They looked over from the pile of metal that may have been taking the vague shape of something, staring at Isa rather quizzically.

“Since when have you cared about my personal affairs in any way?” They narrowed their eyes, “That’s… Suspicious.”

“Well, you mentioned it a few days ago, but given my usual lack of regard for such things I just needed to be assured that I hadn’t simply dreamed it. I do hate being mistaken… In any case, it is relevant to me. I’ll have to stay at home this weekend, without you here to help me get my binder on…” He sighed, returning his attention to the laptop, “Not that we’re expected to work weekends anyhow, but it is good to know ahead of time. I’ll avoid setting any experiments I would need to collect results from during the weekend.”

“I see… Is work all you think about?” They questioned as they picked up a few more-intact gears from the scrap pile in front of them, setting those aside for later use, “Not that you’ll miss me while I’m away, or anything?”

“Hm… no, doesn’t seem to be so,” He shrugged, continuing to type something, “It’d be nice to get a breather, honestly. You’re quite the pain in the neck most of the time and as grateful as I am for everything you do for me, even somebody who was as eccentric as you would need the occasional break from dealing with your behaviors… and I am clearly not even in that category.”

“Always the brutally honest one, Isa Souma! I appreciate it, though. I would rather know precisely what you think of me than for you to lie to spare my feelings… such a thing would hardly be like you,” They shrugged, smiling softly, “I never thought that I would enjoy spending time with somebody as unsufferable as you, but there is a certain charm to it.”

“What’s that you’re making?” Isa questioned, immediately shifting the subject away from anything emotional.

“Oh, this?” They held up the metal that was starting to look kind of like a bird of some sort. Maybe a pheasant? “It’s a gift for my older sister! She just got a huge promotion, so I absolutely must do something to congratulate her on this important career move!”

“Are you sure this sister of yours will appreciate a bird made out of scrap metal?”

“Of course she will! I’m making it move, too! It will turn its head and release a chirping noise when she pushed a button on its back! This is her favorite type of bird you see, so of course she’ll love the gift! I’m so thoughtful!” Tohri proclaimed, holding the work in progress aloft, “It’s a simple project… I would usually make something better, but I don’t have the time! My siblings always love the gifts I make for them!”

“Siblings… how many do you have? And what’s it like? I’m an only child, so it’s natural that I’d be curious,” Isa quickly covered himself to make sure that he didn’t seem like he was legitimately wondering about Tohri’s life.

“I have two! My sister is a bigshot businesswoman, and my brother manages a fashion company! It’s all very clean and trim fashions, and although he doesn’t actually design most of it, I’d buy the brand all the time if it was in any way my style! And then there’s me. My lucky parents, they got a girl, a boy, and an other!” 

“I see… it sounds like everyone in your family is very successful,” Isa nodded, “A businesswoman, a company manager, and an engineer… Are you lying to me?”

“Not in the least bit! I know it seems against the odds, but Nishikikoujis are notoriously hard workers! Besides, before I got this job I was just working as a waiter! My brother worked at a fast food place, and my sister started at the company she works at as an unpaid intern. We didn’t start out so amazing, but I won’t deny that we are now, nor would I lie about it! Besides, I am the youngest. They have both had much more time to get to where they are today, so you must believe me!”

“I suppose that makes enough sense,” He nodded, “And, your parents, they…?”

“They are proud of all three of us and supportive of our lifestyles!” They flipped their hair back behind their shoulder, “Why, you should meet my parents someday!”

“What, meeting your parents… do you suddenly think we’re dating too? Isn’t that usually what people do when their relationship is getting serious?” He questioned blankly, and maybe this was the closest Isa Souma ever got to telling a joke. 

“I just want you to meet them because I figure you deserve to know what an actual _good_ adult is like, given that your experiences seem to be incredibly limited. Your uncle may be the only person from the past generation you’ve ever met who I would consider to be a good interaction for you… But if you meet my parents, that will change! Besides, I’ve met your parents before, so you may as well meet mine too…” They pouted slightly.

“Some other time. It would be too much hassle, to add me on to this particular trip,” He applied logic as an excuse, and Tohri knew it was an excuse, but unfortunately, they couldn’t really argue with him either. It was good logic. And if they showed up to this home visit with a previously non-mentioned friend of theirs, they could be in some hot… or at least, mildly lukewarm water for having never mentioned their potential boyfriend before.

“I suppose… that’s correct,” They sighed, “However! You cannot avoid it forever! You will become acquainted with my family!”

“If your family is anything like you, I doubt I’ll be doing anything else after meeting them,” He rolled his eyes, “I’ll be too busy being dead.”

“Oh, come on, you’re overreacting!”

“Coming from the resident monarch of overreaction.”

Come Friday afternoon, Isa sent Tohri off with an unceremonious “Have fun and don’t die,” which was probably one of the better goodbyes that Isa had given in his life. For about half an hour he milled about, unable to focus on work just now (he blamed fibro fog, though he’d rarely been impacted by it in the past. He refused to believe it could possibly be that he was better off while Tohri was here…

When that half hour was up, he realized that he wasn’t going to be able to get anything done that weekend, but he most certainly wouldn’t do something as useless as doing nothing at all for the entire weekend… he supposed the best course of action would be to take the opportunity he’d been given, with his protective friend’s absence, and picked up his cell phone, dialing a number that he’d never put into his phone, but had memorized.

“Hello, Doctor Kawara? Nishikikouji is out of town for the weekend, so I was wondering… if you might want to come over?”


	9. Chapter 9

Tohri knew that something was up the minute they arrived home; well, they were visiting _home_ , but the apartment they shared with Isa was much more of a home to them at this point, given that as much as they did love their family, it was really quite the adventure to visit them, and after even another Nishikikouji’s interactions with other Nishikikoujis, they would certainly need to relax. Unfortunately, there was no relaxation awaiting them with Isa Souma.

The first and most prominent thing that they noticed was that he was well-groomed, and that was an incredibly shocking development; for Isa to have taken a shower in the last two days without Tohri here to remind him was a gigantic red flag.

“I’m back!” They had proclaimed with their usual gusto upon entering the apartment, only to immediately continue on to trompse up to Isa and touch his hair upon noticing (in seconds) that it was clean, “Your hair! You showered while I was gone! This means that you either finally decided to get the act of caring for yourself together, or else there is something very strange going on here…” They let go of his hair and ran over to the kitchen, checking the fridge and the unemptied trash can, “Clearly it is not the former, seeing as all you ate while I was away was two granola bars and,” They lifted something out of the trash and squinted their eyes, examining the wrapper, “A butterscotch candy…?”

“It was somewhat disgusting,” Isa shrugged, not looking up from his computer at all. He hadn’t since Tohri got back, even despite their denial of personal space regarding the cleanliness state of his hair.

“Isa Souma there are only two types of people in this world who regularly own butterscotch candies! The elderly, and Ryuuji Kawara!” They shouted, tossing the wrapper back in the trash can and putting their hands on their hips, making a pivot turn to look at Isa and letting their hair (currently down from its ponytail due to the lump being rather uncomfortable on the plane) swing wildly around their shoulders as they glared, voice strained with a strange level of anger that didn’t seem quite motivated by plain fury, “He was here, wasn’t he!?”

“Doctor Kawara was indeed in our apartment at some point during your trip,” He mumbled in response, keeping a flat poker face and similar poker voice.

“Isa Souma I DEMAND that you be completely honest with me, right this instant,” They stomped towards him again, closing his laptop and leaning over him, their additional height even more intimidating while he was seated, and with their hair falling all in their face.

“I… May, have instituted certain relationships with Doctor Kawara,” He glanced away, adjusting his glasses and refusing to look Tohri in the eyes.

“Isa…..” They whined, standing up straight again and dragging their hands down their face, “Isaaaaaa…. Jeeze,” They shook their head, “What was the one thing I told you not to do?”

“There are actually a lot of things you-”

“The ONE thing I told you not to do was have sex with our boss! Then I go away for two days and you did exactly that, didn’t you?” They stomped one foot on the ground, groaning, and altogether throwing a tantrum.

“How did you know that-”

“That’s the only reason that anyone dates somebody so much younger than them! If Doctor Kawara wanted to date somebody for an emotional connection, he would look to his own age group! He would look to his wife! That’s what older men will do, Isa. That’s how they are!” They started pacing in circles, “Kawara especially! You have shown objectively poor judgment for possibly the first time in your prodigal life!”

“Well maybe that’s your experience with older men, but I’d say that our situations are at least mildly different. Kawara isn’t like that at all,” Isa shook his head, eyes blank, “No… He’s not.”

“Regardless of that, the fact stands that you did indeed. Have. Intercourse,” They snipped, shaking their head and frowning, “Isa, you’re going to become pregnant! That would be horrible!”

“It would, but it isn’t going to happen-”

“You really expect me to believe that Ryuuji Kawara would use protection?? I can say with almost complete confidence that he would outright prefer NOT to. It may even turn him on. I couldn’t say this with absolutely complete confidence of course, seeing as of course I wouldn’t PERSONALLY know, but…” They started picking at the dirt under their nails, sighing again, “There is certainly… A risk.”

“No there isn’t. Maybe he wouldn’t use protection, but I am on birth control…” Isa mumbled, crossing his arms and feeling altogether uncomfortable in this conversation.

“Mmhmm,” Tohri frowned, opening the fridge again and pulling something out from behind the eggs, “You mean THIS birth control??” They held it out and it resembled morse code with all of the days that Isa had skipped.

“Why was it in the fridge?”

“You put it there! So not only have you skipped many days, you clearly haven’t taken it at all in enough time that you forgot where you put it! This doesn’t even need to be refrigerated!”

“...Right. Well, that underground doctor of yours, Alphonse was his name? I’m sure that if there’s any issue he could-”

“He’s a very good doctor, but not that good! I would trust him with taking fat off of a chest, yes, but not with something like that! You could die, Isa Souma. Die. That would be the worst possible thing, even worse than carrying a child! There’s no recovering from death!”

“Nishikikouji, if-”

“Answer me this, Isa. Would you prefer to die and never do anything again ever, or would you rather take a year off of work and put up with some increased dysphoria for a few months, then go back to living life as usual? You could put the child up for adoption, or… I could even take care of them! I haven’t expected to be a parent for years now, but I could certainly do it. I was once very well prepared,” They offered, grinning and keeping a hand against their chest.

“If you want to be a parent, have your own child. I would in fact, rather die than carry a child to term… If Alphonse won’t do it, and I certainly won’t be going to any hospitals, I’ll just do it myself. I’m sure I could learn how, with a few weeks of research-”

“Isa Souma! What could possibly make you think that I would ever allow you to perform a crude abortion on yourself?? No. No, I would TIE YOU UP if that was what I had to do to keep you from literally murdering yourself painfully! You are to either carry the child to term or get yourself to a legitimate doctor!” They hissed, then relaxed somewhat, mumbling softly, “I can’t have my own child, anyway.”

“Well, why not?”

“Well that’s a very long story that I’m certain you, with your complete and utter lack of caring about the feelings of anybody but yourself, selfishly, you would not want to hear. The short version, however, is that I had a miscarriage. There was too much internal bleeding as a result, and I needed to get a hysterectomy or else I would die,” They explained, leaning back against a wall in exasperation.

“Oh. Well… I’m sorry,” Isa sounded sincere for about one second before he continued on in his usual flatness, “I would ask how that was plausible given the age I met you at, but of all the people I’ve met you’re definitely the one most likely to be involved in a teen pregnancy ordeal.”

“Indeed! It was awful! If not for that and all of the complications, my career would be in an even better place right now! Perhaps I would already have a doctorate!” They crossed their arms, “It was in my first year of high school, at which point I was about to launch myself on the fast track of quickly and deftly obtained college credits, seeing as I had already gained a large portion of them through my elementary school years… Similarly to you, I am a prodigy! The only reason I did not already have my degree at your same age was out of concerns for my social life! However, all the time spent on medical concerns led me to living my genius life out with the same speed as the next common person…”

“Your first year of high school… Wasn’t that when…?” He trailed off and looked up at Tohri, who stared back at him with scrutiny, “Okay. The truth is, I took four showers. Doing that… With Doctor Kawara, it wasn’t like it was unsatisfying, or that I certainly did instigate and consent, but following after, I must admit I did feel… Disgusting.”

“Hm,” Tohri frowned, “That’s not a very good experience to have as your first time. It’s your own fault, given how much I warned you against getting involved with him, but… I am sorry.”

“I do like him. I want to try and make things work, but… Preferably without so much of that,” Isa shrugged, “It wasn’t so much…” He frowned, trying to figure out just how to word it, “I mean. He called me a girl. He corrected himself, and he apologized, but he did…” He almost added one more bit onto that sentence. Almost admitted one more thing, but he couldn’t do that.

“Why even try? Isa, he’s married! Regardless of his motives, you can’t deny that you had a regrettable sexual experience with him, and no romance. For all you know, he could consider you to be little more than a one night stand! Don’t let your attraction to him fool you into thinking that you’re dating now, just because you slept together one time. I doubt _he_ will want to work things out, regardless of how hard you may be willing to attempt. Even if he does, you’re never going to have a good relationship. You just won’t. Sneaking around in secret with a man 30% older than you? That’s no fun. Especially not as a first relationship.”

“Well,” Isa hesitated, turning away, “What would a better relationship be like?”

“Being able to spend loads of time together! Enjoying time spent in each other’s presence, regardless of what you are doing! A good relationship is caring, and the both of you making sure that the other person feels like the most, or at least second most important person in your world if you have high self-esteem. It’s hijinks!” They attempted to explain, but probably just sounded like a complete and utter fool.

“I see… sounds atrocious,” He shrugged it off, sighing, “I hope you have fun with that, someday, seeing as you clearly do intend to find somebody. Although, I don’t see how you possibly could, with such an ugly personality…”

“What was that!?” They turned their nose up, crossing their arms again and sneering.

“Well, you wear so much makeup it isn’t very well plausible to just call you ugly straight out,” He raised his eyebrows, watching Tohri’s amusingly melodramatic reactions to his obvious teasing.

“Hmph! You have seen me without my makeup, Isa Souma! You know that my radiant beauty pervades each and every aspect of my life! I only wear makeup to better coordinate my perfect face with my outfits.”

~

It was not surprising to either of them when, within the next few weeks, Isa was constantly arriving at work late, requesting that Tohri go on ahead without him. They never ended up personally witnessing it, thanks to this request to which they complied (if nothing else, to explain that their roommate would be running late) but it was obvious that he was probably busy with more important things than work, like vomiting. One of the few things in life that Isa probably would deem worthy of skipping work for. The other worthy thing being an inability to pass, which he would soon find himself stuck in. Even able to pass off early stages as weight loss wouldn’t help, given that binding was just a bit too risky in that state.

At least his paranoia had kept him from starting any sort of hormone therapy before this… incident. If he had, it would be much more complicated. He’d need to stop completely, and even then there could be issues. As it was, however, he requested the next year off (as requesting eight months would be a bit too suspicious) just as soon as he started showing, and of course received it. Takaba labs was good that way; there’d be no union picketing at a place like this, that was for sure.

It was… strange, to say the least, being home by himself while Tohri was working at the labs. Not to say that he really saw them very much during the day, given that they worked in an entirely different department, but knowing they were busy working while Isa was stuck at home was all too reminiscent of the past, when Tohri waited tables at a restaurant downtown and Isa lived on his parents’ money. So was he the freeloader now? It sort of did feel that way. He spent his days still compiling information on Takaba projects, however, and going on that biology forum. Taking time off was one thing, but spending that time in a complete void of productivity was another that Isa would simply never touch. Getting the opportunity to do something that interested him, running experiments and learning about how living organisms functioned, it was something that he never thought he’d even get.

Of course he was going to be a workaholic. He had to prove to himself that he really could do this, had to make the most of the opportunity. Had to prove to everyone else…

He’d heard the rumors about him, of course; they were all over, and they were bound to be. He was the most likely member of the lab teams to be incompetent, and anyone with even a scrap of malice left over from middle school latched onto that idea. He didn’t even have a single _part_ of a scientific degree, after all. Most of the prodigies there had at least made progress on a fitting degree and been pulled into the program for their exemplary performance, but he was something entirely different. The single example of nepotism on the entire island… and he sure did get flack for it.

It was motivation, though. Motivation to prove himself worthy, to prove that he may have been picked out of favoritism, but it was his abilities that kept him on board. Despite being technically on vacation, he continued to do busywork, continued to do anything he was asked via email if he was capable, in general continued being an active member of the community but suddenly a hermit.

Midway through one of these days, he stood up from what he was working on, a momentous action in the past but far more common now. It was much harder to focus these days, and he was in much more pain in general. Whether it was a result of the pregnancy or his fibro deciding to suddenly get worse and truly inflict more symptoms, he really couldn’t tell, but it was there regardless of what explanation there may be. He went to lie down, seeing as that always seemed to help the pain at least, although it really was a dreadful lack of any overarching usefulness in any way. He didn’t even feel up to reading, or using his phone. He just wanted to lie down there, with his thoughts. Sort them out. There were a line of thoughts he’d been holding onto for a while now, and it was time he actually got those thoughts in order.

“Hey,” He was woken up a couple of hours later, having fallen asleep without noticing. Not an altogether strange happenstance while lying down in a bed in pain and exhausted, anyway. The voice belonged, of course, to Tohri, “You aren’t feeling great today, are you?”

“How could you tell. The fact that I’m lying down and apparently napping, rather than doing anything worthwhile with my time…?” Isa groaned, sitting up slowly, only for Tohri to lean over, hands on either side of his waist.

“Isa…” They sighed, a bit of hair falling over their face, “You seem to have a skewed view on what exactly worthwhile means. Just because you aren’t working doesn’t mean you’re wasting time…” They leaned in a little closer, voice breathy and faint, “Hey…” They looked into his eyes for just another moment before internally flinging caution to the wind and leaning in closer, kissing him softly. Gently, if only for a moment.

“...Tohri,” He muttered, bringing a hand up slowly to touch his own lips. There’d been a small level of lipgloss transfer, it seemed, “I…”

“I know, I know,” They sighed, furrowing their brow and turning away, pressing their palms against their eyes then hissing through their teeth, “That was. That was an incredibly idiotic action! After all, there’s no way that you like me when you’re so busy being head-over-heels for somebody like Ryuuji Kawara!” They were getting choked up, “And here I am, going to cry over a boy AGAIN. This is so. Pathetic!” They shook their head then turned to Isa again, glaring, “Let me tell you something, Isa Souma! Ryuuji Kawara DOESN’T. CARE. ABOUT. YOU.”

He could do nothing but stare back at them, shock evident in his face. Tohri took a few deep breaths, staring as well, calming down from their anger but crying more, tears actually appearing on their face now as they spoke, faintly, “I. I mean… he does. He just doesn’t care about you… like I do,” They wiped their eyes, standing up as their hair, which had come loose from the ponytail, now hung in disappointing strands over their face. They didn’t seem anywhere near as tall as usual now, “He doesn’t love you unconditionally,” In fact, they looked more like a ragdoll than a person with bones, “Like… I do.”

“Please leave me alone,” Isa whispered, sounding like he’d just been punched in the chest.

“He wanted me to tell you… that he’s officially ending your affair. His wife is pregnant, and he wants to… set a good example, for his child,” They were getting steadily more upset as they said this, “He always says he’ll change, you know. It’s just an excuse to leave you behind when he’s tired of you…” They didn’t wait for a response to this, grabbing their laptop bag and leaving the room. Isa heard another door slam, slightly in the distance.

So they were leaving altogether, were they?

He wanted to say that he didn’t care.  
But he couldn’t.  
When a week passed and it was clear that Tohri Nishikikouji wasn’t returning, he cried. Just a little bit, and it wasn’t a big deal, just a few tears on his cheeks as he fell asleep, but he rarely did such a thing at all; and even now, he didn’t want to admit that he had. Didn’t want to admit that he cared, and that he was now just… so completely alone. He stopped answering emails, doing work. Another week and a half later, when he was starting to wonder if he would die here in this apartment, alone and uncared for, that he received a phone call.

“Utsuro Ichijou. The name of a prestigious politician’s daughter, who went missing several months ago and was assumed to be in America. Has actually been spending her time on an island in the midst of international waters, masquerading as a man named Isa Souma and committing her time to scientific research. Also the name of an idiot. So, dearie, you have this single phone call to give me one good reason not to have your body turn up in some American ditch, the sad sob story of a runaway girl who just couldn’t handle the world out on her own.”

“Ah… Asuka…” He muttered, holding the phone to his ear. Surprising even to him, he didn’t sound afraid in the least. He knew exactly how to spin this, after all. The one upside to a horrible situation, wasn’t it? “I’m pregnant, you see. Twins. You’re going to be a Grandmother.”


	10. Chapter 10

“That certainly does change things, doesn’t it, Utsuro? Well, in that case, we can certainly work out… An agreement. You will be allowed to live, under several conditions to which you must comply one hundred percent.”

“I’ll do… Whatever you want me to…” He mumbled into the phone, lethargic, “I don’t want to die… And I’m sick of being alone.”

“Well clearly this horrible idea of yours turned out just great. The fact that you’d be so agreeable… You must really be torn up over something. You want to talk about it?”

“No. I don’t. Isn’t that line usually said by mothers who didn’t just threaten assassination?” His tone didn’t match the statement, still just as completely lackluster.

“This is true. Anyhow, I am proud of you for finally agreeing to comply with your father and I’s intentions. Maybe you just needed to mature a bit…” She chuckled into the phone, and Isa just kept staring at the wall. He wasn’t afraid of her right now. He didn’t really feel anything.

“Tell me your demands. I’ll do them.”

“The Ichijou Group is going to acquire the Takaba conglomerate. You may continue working there, but the lab will now do research that we deem useful and pertinent. With the lab belonging to the Ichijou Group, there should be no conflicts regarding your campaigns, which will launch within a few months of your children being born. We’ll begin small, the house of representatives… Don’t think you could possibly get away with local positions anymore. Of course, you’ll work up to the house of councillors alongside your father,” She sighed into the receiver, “You will also grow your hair out again. Start dressing nicely. All in all, you must become the model daughter, and in turn, the model mother. In addition, the father of your children… Whatever degenerate he may be, will be the one to name them.”

“What’s the point of that last request?” Isa questioned, though not in an aggressive way. Just curious, really. How astonishingly strange, and Asuka noted this.

“Oh, that’s just to annoy you. I can only imagine you’ve had a falling out with the father, if you’re acting… Like this. As much as I would like to believe you’ve matured, nobody, not even you, speaks so slowly and without tonal differences unless there is something very emotionally wrong. Of course, you know that I can’t just _not_ take advantage of this situation. I really don’t want to kill you, you know. As long as you’re willing to be useful… It would be a waste of all the time and money we spent on raising you.”

“You haven’t changed a bit. It’s been a little more than a year since I left, hasn’t it?” He questioned, “You still have all the tenderness of a brick.”

“It’s been fourteen months, to be somewhat more precise. What? I’m an adult. I’ve done all of the changing that I’m going to do, after all,” She sounded incredibly careless, “So, you’re going to do what I’ve told you?”

“I am,” He nodded, closing his eyes, “I’ll do everything you said. After all… I have to keep up the Ichijou name…”

“Very good. Thank you for your cooperation, Utsuro.”

-

“Hello! Seeing as we have recently been obtained by another group, there are going to be some changes made around here. A larger budget and more connections means our staff is getting larger! I will continue to be in charge of one area, Life Science Research, but we’re going to have a new overall manager appointed by the new owners, and some more divisions. I’ll elaborate on who leads what department later, but for now let’s just meet our manager,” Ryuuji Kawara grinned as he stood in front of all his employees, checking the papers in his hand, “It says here that our new manager is going to be a woman named Utsuro Ichijou. The new owners’ daughter…”

“Thank you, Doctor Kawara, but I can take it from here,” A sharp voice cut through the room, projecting with confidence despite not wearing a microphone. Everyone could hear not only the voice, but the sound of heels clicking on the small stage as the owner of that voice walked across it. It was really just a raised platform in the middle of a cafeteria-type area, but it served its purpose of announcements quite well, “My name is Utsuro Ichijou, and I will now be supervising all activities in this lab and on this island as a whole. That’s all you need to know. Any questions?”

“Hey!” Someone raised a hand, and Isa turned to them. Nobody he recognized, “I have a question. You look a lot like somebody who used to work here. Isa Souma… Are you related?”

Isa narrowed his eyes slightly, then lied in a perfectly believable flatline, “He’s my cousin. Next question?”

“How can we trust you to supervise our labs if you’re a lawyer and a politician?? Do you have any experience with sciences at all?”

“I assure you, my job here has nothing to do with experimental processes. My supervision is for the purpose of ensuring that you engage in research which is beneficial to the Ichijou political group. All of the technicalities lie on your shoulders just the same as always. The only change in these labs is the institution of organized leadership per department, and a shift in the nature of your studies. Next?”

“Are you going to be making any changes to HR policies? If you change one single thing I’m calling in a union.”

“The Ichijou group means to maintain the integrity and quality of Takaba’s work. Clearly, the HR policies are an important factor in your ability to consistently produce, perhaps less relevant, but much more verifiable work than any other lab currently operating. Nothing will be changes. You will be able to continue with the policy of taking as many vacation days as necessary, working short hours, and taking a portion of the day for personal projects, as well as no obligation to put any work in during your off hours,” Isa had fought to keep these policies in place, using the very reasons he cited as an argument to his parents. Well, argument was an overstatement given that if he’d failed to convince them, he would have no choice but to give up. The only piece of information he omitted now was the, useless in this case but useful in the other, fact that despite having no obligation most employees did continue to work from their apartments after clocking out, “I believe I’ve covered everything. Any other questions?”

“I have one,” Somebody who was much less generic than any of the other askers piped up. They didn’t have a hand in the air, but Isa knew that if they had, the bedazzling on their nails would have probably blinded him with the awful lighting. He blinked a few times, then turned away, ignoring the person who had come up with another question, “Hey! Don’t walk away from me. My question is, how does it feel to walk in those heels?”

“Positively awful, honestly,” Isa answered, immediately leaving the room after his response, seeing as he hadn’t halted at all in his progress towards the door.

Tohri watched him leave from the two seats they were taking up, draped awkwardly over the table-attached stools, then sighed, turning their attention back to the platform where Ryuuji stepped back into the center, “Well, that was our new supervisor! Lovely lady, isn’t she? In any case, I’ll read off the new department heads now!”

Tohri tuned him out, not wanting to listen to his overly cheerful voice any longer, nor anything that he was saying about Isa. Their own grudges against Ryuuji were one thing, but the impact that he’d had on Isa was another entirely. The question they’d posed was a loaded one, carefully crafted despite the seemingly simple nature of it. They’d asked it in order to determine one thing; if Isa had reconciled his gender dysphoria somehow, they would of course be supportive, but this was not the case. He had become Utsuro Ichijou again out of no desire of his own… They did not want to associate with him again, of course, but they did need to clarify for their own ability to refer to him, mentally, in the proper way…

Ah, but they certainly weren’t hung up over him! That day they’d walked out, they meant it. Isa had told them to leave him alone, after all… And the way he said it, all they heard was ‘go away and never come back’. Clearly he didn’t want them around, and his reaction to their question proved that hadn’t changed a bit. How unfortunate. No, wait. It wasn’t unfortunate at all, because they didn’t care. They were over him. Right.

“Head of the optics division is… Ah! Tohri Nishikikouji!” Some of Ryuuji’s prattle actually reached their ears, and they looked up, dazed for a moment before standing, “Great work, Nishikikouji, and here’s to lots more from you in the future! Anyway, looks like that was the last department, so… This meeting is over!”

Once dismissived, everybody went off their separate ways, mostly back to their apartments. Tohri was no exception, arriving soon back at their own. It wasn’t very immaculate, although none of the mess was food-based, so they weren’t very concerned. They wouldn’t get mold, or ants, so it was fine, even if they kept stepping on things and breaking them… The fact that they just didn’t bother to clean up despite having the energy to do so was a little disappointing. They remembered how clean Isa kept things despite having chronic pain and being much more low-energy, and felt bad… Sometimes. Then they remembered that Isa had so rudely wanted them out of his life despite all they’d done for him, and they didn’t care so much anymore.

But… He was here, now, and clearly back in the action. Seeing him again had set loose all sorts of emotions that Tohri was certain they’d violently strangled, then put in prison on the moon for good measure. It was infuriating. It had been almost two years since they’d last seen Isa. The matter of the Ichijou group acquiring Takaba took a long time, and surely it took quite a while for Isa to prepare for the task… Surely, after this much time they would have moved on. They were counting on it, and yet… It didn’t seem to be the case.

At least, if they did decide to seek Isa out, they had the perfect excuse; due to the location of the island, postage from anyone but family was strictly prohibited. They had gotten a gift from their brother of additional clothing when they’d mentioned (maybe more like ranted) about the incident and noted that they’d been in such a tizzy that they’d left all their clothing behind. Things from their brother’s company were certainly nice, well-fitted and flattering to any body shape so long as purchased in the right size, but it was so very drab. The most vibrant any color got in any line put out by that brand was maroon, or possibly navy. They were sort of tied in vibrantness, being not very vibrant at all, in the least.

So if Tohri was to pay a visit to Isa, they could very easily play it off as necessity to retrieve their forgotten clothing after all this time, anger over losing it all reignited after the first time Isa showed his sorry, attractive face again. In fact, they thought that they were going to do just that! Yes. They still remembered the apartment number, of course, given that they’d lived there for quite a while, and… had dwelled on it ever since. As much as they constantly tried to convince themself that they were over it, they were always the type of person to hold a grudge.

They… well, of course it was upsetting that they’d been turned down in regards to romanticism aimed at Isa Souma, but they could have dealt with that just fine. As long as they’d still been allowed to be his friend, to be by his side and help him deal with the many things that life threw at him… But, that hadn’t happened. They’d lost their position as any sort of associate to Isa, and that was what really hurt them. One stupid decision ruined everything, and it was definitely all Isa’s fault because any SENSIBLE person wouldn’t end a long-standing and mutually beneficial friendship over a kiss and an outburst.

They knocked on the door of Isa’s apartment within the next ten minutes, standing with a hand on their hip and absolutely ready for what would surely be a confrontation. They had one foot ready to stick into the door, just in case Isa slammed it on them and tried to get out of saying a word to them. This was incredibly likely, given his reaction to the question they’d asked earlier during the announcements. Trying to avoid even hearing it because he didn’t want to associate with them, well, that was almost as rude as kicking them out in the first place.

“What are you doing here?” Isa questioned while opening the door, not even bothering with looking to see who it was. Nobody but Tohri Nishikikouji would ever knock on a door that way. As soon as he’d opened the door Tohri could see right over him into the apartment, given the height, and they saw… two? Two. Two tiny children run across the living room. That was odd. They just figured they were seeing things. The apartment was much less immaculate now.

“I’m here to retrieve the clothing that I left in your possession two years ago, Isa Souma!” Tohri turned their nose up, tapping their foot and looking Isa over. He had already changed into pajamas, clearly having not expected company, swapped his contacts for glasses, and tied his hair back in a low ponytail. He looked much more like himself now than he had up on that platform earlier, “And no other reason whatsoever! I do not want to speak to you and I am certain that you do not want to speak to me…”

“Oh…” Isa seemed almost disappointed, turning away and smiling in a manner that was nothing short of bitter, “Of course. Let me go find the boxes… I put them in your old room,” He turned and walked further in the house, hesitating before Tohri’s old door, “You can step inside, and please do close the door. Keeping it open for too long could lead to disaster,” and with that, he disappeared into the other room.

“Disaster…?” They questioned, raising an eyebrow only to feel something crash into their leg. Two somethings. When they looked down, they saw… children. Very small children, less than two years old, and both were clinging to their legs with a great fervor, “Oh.”

“Merry Christmas!” They both said in unison, despite it not being anywhere near Christmas. They were identical, each with an unruly mop of blue-ish hair and eyes the color of grapes. Wait, no, not grapes. They were violet. Just like Isa’s eyes.

“So, you’re the children…” They leaned down, smiling softly at the kids attached to their legs, “What are your names…?”

“Miru and Kaku,” Isa answered as he walked back through the door with three boxes stacked up in his arms, “Don’t try to tell them apart. I’m the only one who can, and I make sure they’re dressed appropriately to distinguish, however…” He glared at the kids, “They have this habit of convincing Asuka to buy them matching sweaters, which they change into while I’m not here… it got to such a point, combined with their painful nature, that my babysitter quit on me today. This is the first day.”

“I see… why are they named that, dare I ask?” Tohri questioned as they shook the little devils off their legs and stepped forward to grab the boxes.

“Merry Christmas!” One of them (Kaku) piped up brightly, sitting down on the floor.

“Asuka made me let Kawara name them. And… they were born on Christmas. Kawara also took it upon himself to ensure that their first words were Merry Christmas. Just as soon as they learned it, he stopped coming by for any reason but to drop off child support. A relief, honestly. I don’t want much of anything to do with that man, and I don’t need to be seeing his sculpted biceps often enough to be reminded of why I ever bothered with him in the first place,” Isa explained, “But you said you didn’t want to talk to me. Sorry. You can go.”

“Well, I’m shocked you bothered to give me so many words as you did, Isa Souma!” Tohri straightened up, then frowned as they looked at the boxes, then around the apartment, “This place has three bedrooms… do the twins each have their own?”

“No, they refuse to be separated, and I refuse to allow them to take over your room,” Isa shrugged, turning away, “You’re not wrong to assume that I was upset with you, but it’s been quite a while. I guess I’ve let it go… that really was an awful move though. Walking out on me like that…”

“Walking out on you!?” Tohri questioned sharply, shaking their head, “I did no such thing! You kicked me out! After you did something like that to me, of course you wouldn’t care to reconcile, and I shouldn’t care either!”

“I did no such thing,” He insisted, frowning.

“Why don’t we take this somewhere less loud to discuss the matter further?” Tohri asked, scoffing against the constant backdrop of holiday cheer that the children were producing.

“Right. Your room,” Isa responded softly, then turned and walked into Tohri’s room, followed closely by them. They closed the door, then stared at Isa.

“You told me to leave you alone. You made it clear that I wasn’t welcome… The way you said it. You practically told me to go away and never speak to you or your sons again,” Tohri insisted, “It is only out of the goodness of my heart that I am speaking to you after such a grievance!”

“Is that the reason?” Isa asked, tilting his head, “Or are you doing it because you like me?”

“What a loaded question, Isa Souma! Last time I told you that I cared about you was the last time that we spoke for nearly two years thanks to your rude behavior-”

“It was your ridiculous melodrama that made you think that. I never wanted you to move out, Tohri. I just needed time to think about it. Time to make sure that I wasn’t still asleep when you said those things and time to convince myself that you were sincere… then it seemed, by your departure, that you weren’t. However…”

“However?”

“If you were to say things like that again, I think I would take it on blind faith. A foolish decision, but I really have become a fool. You saw me at the announcement today. I just,” He hesitated, then sighed heavily and sat down on the bed, staring at the ground and letting his hair fall in his face, “Without you, I fell apart. I just want you here with me again. I don’t care how. You can hate me for all I care, just don’t… leave me again…”

“Isa…” Tohri stared at him, taking deep breaths then stepping forward and crouching down to look at his face. He wasn’t crying, but did he ever? Every other sign pointed to him being in disrepair, and suddenly Tohri wasn’t so sure they wanted to stop caring. No, they were certain that any attempt at getting over Isa Souma had become, in these past moments, a pointless endeavor, “Well, foolish as it may be for both of us, it would be wonderful, if you could believe me now. I wouldn’t want to leave you alone… and if there’s one thing not to be believed here, it isn’t the fact that I love you. It’s the fact that I ever thought I couldn’t.”


	11. Chapter 11

Isa remained still for a moment, just staring into Tohri’s eyes, and Tohri waited with bated breath. God, that was a sappy line, what a ridiculous thing to say. They couldn’t believe that they’d blurted something like that, but then again, it was clear it was a habit of theirs to say things that they shouldn’t at times that they shouldn’t out of some ridiculously overwhelming need to express the great number of emotions they inexplicably felt toward this man. They only let out the breath they’d been holding when Isa moved, slowly, wrapping his arms around their neck and drawing them in close, holding their head against his shoulder and hiding his face in their hair.

“Ah… Isa, you’re going to muss my hair,” Tohri chuckled nervously, but at least that chuckle let out the breath they’d been holding, and their comment was clearly manufactured, seeing as their next action was to hold him close and bury their face even further into his shoulder. He wasn’t warm; Tohri had always seemed to have a higher body temperature than him, but he was… comfortable, to hold. They felt right. They felt… as if being able to hold onto Isa again, after all this time, was some sort of miracle.

“You priss,” He muttered, shaking his head and chuckling under his breath a bit, slowly loosening his grip then pulling away and placing the palm of his hand against the side of Tohri’s cheek, staring at him with an unprecedented intensity and breathing slowly, trying to take in every inch of Tohri’s face. It wasn’t exactly the same as before… “Did you get… plastic surgery?”

“Mm, my mother had a ‘two for the price of one’ coupon for mild rhinoplasty. It was our bonding activity last time I visited her, and my birthday present, as well as some clothing to replace that which I lost in the event of… leaving it here,” They nodded a bit, “It felt almost as if I was betraying Alphonse by having work done by somebody else, but seeing as it was a social activity with my mother, it was all right. Otherwise, I look precisely the same as I did two years ago. I made an active effort to remain that way, I’ll have you know.”

“Why? So that I would recognize you in the event that our paths crossed again?” He questioned, and they turned an appealing shade of red as they turned their head to the side, suddenly refusing to meet Isa’s gaze.

“Of course not! I’d never do such a thing!” They insisted, but then sighed softly, “Seeing as I was unsure if I ever would see you again at all, and seeing as I was entirely convinced that you wanted nothing to with me, that just wouldn’t make sense. Besides, I was trying to get over you! It would be ridiculous to maintain my appearance for that purpose!”

“Well then, why did you?” Isa raised an eyebrow, voice level in a taunting sort of way.

“Th-That’s!” Tohri sputtered, turning back to glare at Isa, though they were just blushing even more, “I’m not sure! I suppose then in that case, it could be surmised that I did in fact, _subconsciously_ act with that purpose in mind! However, this is utterly meaningless, seeing as it is in the past, and we should now focus on things in the present,” Tohri raised a finger in the air with great conviction, “For example! The fact that I very nearly forgot how nice your eyes are. And also the fact that while we speak your children are probably breaking every single item in your home.”

“Oh no, that’s not possible. They’ve already broken everything,” Isa shook his head, but stood up anyway, “I’m not sure what I’m going to do with them. I believe I already mentioned to you that their babysitter quit on me?”

“I think so,” Tohri nodded, also getting to their feet and being suddenly reminded of just how much taller they were than Isa, now that they were standing so near to him. He still looked to them like somebody that should be protected, but… he had certainly matured even more, and could clearly handle himself. They’d practically forced him to, though, and that made them feel guilty once more for so absolutely misinterpreting the situation, “Don’t worry, I’ll help you. I told you before that I could take care of them for you! Well, when I thought there was just one, but it still holds true, I will! I absolutely will!”

“You have this ridiculous habit of saying things without considering the consequences or difficulties involved in going through with it. That’s one thing that makes it a shame that you don’t appear to have changed at all in the time we spent apart from each other,” He sighed, bringing his hands back to tighten his ponytail (as it was about to fall out) and wincing.

“And here you are still trying to do things yourself when it would be much more convenient and healthy for you to ask for assistance,” Tohri sighed, pushing Isa’s arms back down then retying his hair themself. They had quite a bit of experience in both tying ponytails and messing with Isa’s hair, so it really wasn’t any trouble at all.

“...Thank you. In any case, it’s ridiculous to say that you’d take care of them for me, caring for twins is an atrocious job that nobody would wish on anyone. Besides, you are now a department head. It would reflect badly on you if you were to constantly take days off for this purpose, regardless of the continued lack of limit on vacation days. And I am certainly too busy. Asuka refuses to give me any aid outside of that which is necessary for my career with the Ichijou Group and campaign,” He said it as if it was simply a fact, and he wasn’t at all bitter. In all honesty, he probably wasn’t; he’d prefer she had even less of a hand in raising his children. The current arrangement was simple. He had to visit (with the children) on holidays and occasional weekends. Those visits were always horrid, and left him hoping that his parents wouldn’t rub off on their grandkids as well as wondering if they’d rubbed off on him.

He certainly hoped not, but he couldn’t deny that he saw some of Asuka in himself. Not that he would ever treat his own children the way she treated him, but he admitted that some of her general abrasiveness had passed on to him. It was especially clear to him now that he was rejoining society at such awfully high force; his behavior at the announcement, for example, was steely and unfortunately reminiscent of Asuka’s own public speaking.

However, he had himself convinced that as long as he didn’t want to be like his parents, he wouldn’t be; even now, when he’d become so submissive to her wishes and resigned himself to a life as her political puppet. The one thing he would never do was become the same as her. He’d maintain some small, miserable spark of himself somewhere.

“Well, I doubt that we’ll be able to find anyone here willing to babysit even one child who hasn’t already been hired for the task, let alone a pair of twins as rambunctious as yours seem to be. Now then, there is always the option of taking them into the office with one of us, but then, having people so prone to breaking things inside of a lab which works with illegal chemicals is probably… not the best course of action, unless we were to install some sort of impenetrable daycare area. Now, I could do this singlehandedly, if I had the clearance to do so…”

“And I could give you clearance if I had the clearance myself,” Isa frowned, crossing his arms, “But unfortunately, I really am just a figurehead at this point. My only personal involvement is that my own knowledge of the experiments conducted in this building will allow me to better influence the direction of research. Any and all executive decisions that are supposedly my jurisdiction are actually in the hands of Asuna. Even your appointment as a department head… though I am unsure why, given that she has made it fully clear that she dislikes you.”

“Well, the record will show my competency, regardless of any personal grudges she may hold against me. However… it does sound like she’s trying to make your life worse, actively. What a bitch,” Tohri groaned, shaking their head, “Then again, if we are dating, it makes sense for me to have that opinion of her, given the amount of societal paradigm focusing on hatred of in-laws… that hatred doesn’t just come with marriage, it’s there all along. In any case, though, you’re probably right that she wouldn’t consent to a daycare area… but what if I was to craft a playpen of sorts, which could be used to keep them under control inside a lab or office?”

“Hm… that wouldn’t break any rules, and it would be better if you or I was to keep an eye on them directly rather than having somebody else attempt it. However, if I am to take them out in public, I’ll have to do _something_ to disguise their appearances,” Isa mumbled, leaning a hand against his chin.

“Well they’ve got your eyes, but that _blue_ could be a dead giveaway of their heritage, I agree… When Uzune bleached his hair, I helped him do it! So I could definitely do the same for them. Don’t worry, I’m so skilled I could do it absolutely painlessly! As… long as they stay still for the process, which does seem unlikely…” They sighed, ‘Well, this is a bit more complicated than I expected…”

“Hm? No, not at all,” Isa shrugged then stepped back out into the living room, then walked into the kitchen and called out, “Miru, Kaku? Would you like some oatmeal for a snack? I’m going to make dinner for myself and our guest but I don’t believe you’d like it…” Despite their limited vocabulary, the kids did seem to _understand_ most of what people said to them, and the animate balls of energy were soon standing just outside the kitchen awning, keeping their feet off of the cool tile. They much preferred the way carpet felt on their feet and had lost all ten pairs of Christmas slippers within a week of getting them.

“Merry Christmas!” Kaku said brightly, then the both of them nodded.

“With sprinkles? I can do that,” Isa chuckled, turning and pulling the packets out of the cupboard, then something from next to the box as well. Tohri stepped over then leaned closer to try and see what it was that Isa had grabbed, then gave him a scrutinous look. They wouldn’t say it out loud in case the children would understand.

“What? I know what I’m doing,” Isa said simply as he poured oatmeal into two bowls, then grabbed one sleeping pill from the bottle and sliced it in half, crushing each half into a bowl along with the food, “I’m not foolish anymore, Nishikikouji. I’ve got quite a bit of practical knowledge these days. Hm, for another example... I would never become involved with somebody like Kawara again.”

“Well I should hope not, now that we are, in essence, an item…” Tohri muttered, glaring a bit, but then just looked confused, “Hold on, what was that about sprinkles earlier? Do their declarations of holiday cheer have some deeper meaning that only you, as their father, can understand?”

“I guess so. It must go along with being able to tell the difference between them… another thing that only I can do. Even Kawara can’t interpret their speech or tell them apart. It’s…” Isa smirked a bit, adding water to the oatmeal as he spoke, “Satisfying, that I can do those things and he cannot. Clearly they are _my_ children. He would never do anything worthwhile in raising them anyhow… if another person was to ever have these same capabilities I would want it to be somebody who’s actually helping me care for them.”

“Well, I can’t say that I know anything about what Merry Christmas could possibly mean aside from Merry Christmas, but I can tell them apart. This one’s Miru and this one’s Kaku, right?” They asked, walking over and tapping each one on the head as they declared the identities of the children standing there, who took the pats as an excuse to latch onto their wrists and try to climb Tohri using their feet.

“Hm… yes, that’s right. Miru, Kaku, I know that Nishikikouji here looks quite a bit like a tree, but they are not for climbing. Please leave them alone before somebody gets hurt,” Isa chuckled under his breath as his children stopped climbing Tohri, dropping back to the ground almost gracefully. The microwave beeped behind him, and he pulled out the oatmeal, stirring each with a small spoon then handing over the whole affair to Miru and Kaku, who immediately ran to the couch and sat down, digging into the food with a great gusto.

“I’ve never seen somebody so excited over… _oatmeal_...” Tohri muttered, watching them and leaning against the wall, then noted that they were definitely out of earshot by now. In the past, yelling had always been necessary in this apartment to be heard between the couch and the kitchen, “In any case, the plan is for me to bleach their hair while they’re sleeping? You assume that I just happen to-”

“I know you do. Or, well, that there’s some in the boxes of things that you left here. I know exactly which box, so I’ll get it,” Isa muttered, going back into Tohri’s room and returning very soon with a box of hair bleach, “I have a good memory, especially considering the chances you could come here demanding singular specific items, or move back in and promptly know where nothing was after I organized it into labeled boxes.”

“What box would hair dye even go into? I don’t understand the concept of organization,” Tohri shook their head, taking the box, “Its only purpose is to help less-seasoned engineers who can’t tell the difference between types of screws and other materials at a glance. In all other walks of life it is absolutely pointless.”

“I see your logic is just as sound as it ever was,” Isa rolled his eyes, “In any case, you can return to your initial state of chaos, should you wish to move back in here. I’m not going to make assumptions, of course. Perhaps you discovered that you prefer living alone to having a roommate after all, seeing as you’d never lived entirely on your own in the past…”

“That simply isn’t true! I once spent an entire weekend at home by myself. No parents, no siblings, only me and the family pet. It was horrible. And living on my own for two years was additionally horrid, but I simply couldn’t find anyone who was both willing to live with me and trustworthy… So, yes. I will in fact be moving back in with you. Don’t you know how fashionable it is to live in sin these days?” They questioned, winking.

“Ridiculous,” Isa groaned, rolling his eyes, “But, listen… Nobody can know that there’s anything between us. I know sneaking about isn’t exactly your idea of a suitable romance, of course. I remember what you said… about what a relationship should be. We couldn’t have that. If Asuka was to find out, or even if Masura did and then told her… I would be killed. I’m not exaggerating at this point. The reasoning behind my association with the Ichijou group, and lack of personally acceptable presentation, is that if I didn’t go along with each and every demand of hers, she was fully prepared to have me murdered.”

“Well… Admittedly, this is true. I would much prefer being able to take you out on dates and the like, however, I am willing to compromise in the effort of maintaining your safety, of course I am! It’s you who I care about, not the idea of a romance with you. Well, I care about that too, but I mean, it isn’t the important part of my feelings!”

“Mm, I understand. So you are all right, with secrecy?” He questioned softly, holding his arms around himself and fixing his gaze at the floor tiles.

“More than all right, dear,” Tohri shrugged, turning to look up at the ceiling themself. Anywhere but at Isa, just as Isa was looking anywhere but at them, “It’s funny. Any other boyfriend I’d have, well, I wouldn’t be satisfied with this sort of relationship. I’d want to be able to show off, that there’s somebody willing to put up with me, but, Isa…” They grew quieter with every word, “Before I met you, I almost thought I was aromantic. I’d flirt with people, I’d revel in relationships and the attention I’d earn from them, take pride in the few weeks I had together with people who tried to care about me… but I wasn’t sure, I didn’t think that I could fall in love,” They looked at him now, cheeks flushed.

“But,” They continued, “People always said, it’s impossible to love until you love yourself. That’s not true, not in the least bit. I never fell in love because I was too focused on myself. It was you, you’re the one who made me change. You’re the one… who made me realize I wasn’t perfect. And that’s what people need. You can’t have a better half, if you think there’s nobody better than you, right? But you. You were somebody who excelled beyond my imagination, somebody better than me. It was infuriating at first, that I had found somebody I could admire. Somebody I wasn’t superior to, but…”

“It’s not quite like that,” Isa said matter-of-factly, turning his head to look Tohri in the eyes, “Individuals cannot be better than each other. Perhaps, as prodigies and scientist, we are better in the eyes of society than others, the both of us. But within those headings, neither of us can be superior. That is the nature of human connection. To fill in the holes of others. To share skills…” He hesitated, “I thought so, at least. But, this feeling I have for you, it can’t be explained scientifically. My attraction to Kawara could be explained in technical terms, but you…” His tone remained blank as he spoke, as did his face, but his emotion somehow carried anyway, “Mm, well. I suppose that this is what love is.”

“Isa, if it isn’t too upsetting,” Tohri tilted their head, questioning with a gentle tone, “What are your current feelings toward Ryuuji Kawara? What is your opinion towards him, two years later? I know that you’re bitter, but…”

“I can’t quite explain that either. I’m beginning to think that genuine emotions are those which cannot be grasped upon. Regarding Ryuuji Kawara… I feel he is neither good nor bad, to me. He’s only a man, and he behaved as men often do. I was a pawn to his adultery. A pretty face, with a fool’s crush that could be acted upon.”

“Naivety,” Tohri muttered, “Naivety is what men like that feed on. It’s impossible, with Ryuuji Kawara, to claim he did any real wrong. He wouldn’t act without the full consent of his partner, of course not. But, he would seek out people who know no better than to give that consent without a second thought. People who are too naive to know that relationships which move that quickly, aren’t necessarily good ones. People who will be too confused in the moment not to indulge him in anything he wishes to do. He doesn’t mean to hurt people. But,” They sighed, moving to sit on the kitchen counter, “He does nonetheless. He lies. Because, Isa Souma, he did say he loved you, but you cannot be fallen in love with so quickly.”

“I always thought you the type to believe in love at first sight.”

“Oh, I do. But, not with you. I believe it to be impossible,” They shrugged, “A physical attraction can occur in a moment, yes, but…” They frowned, “I lived with you for months before I realized I had fallen for you. When I did, it hit me like a train in the chest. It was as if I’d been falling for you my entire life, but only in that moment was it manifested. You sneak your way into people’s hearts, slowly, until you become for them, the most compelling reason for life.”

“That’s certainly an eloquent way to say that you’re bad at recognizing crushes,” Isa teased, but then grew serious again, “However… I understand what you’re saying. It is clear that for a time, there was only platonic affection. Although I believe on my part, as soon as I began to open my heart, I developed feelings for you but refused to accept them as true out of fear for the result.”

“There was no reason to fear,” They assured him, then stood up again, “In any case, with the children out cold, I suppose I should get to work on bleaching their hair? This will be an unfortunately common occurrence, given we’ll need to avoid roots showing…” They crossed their arms as they walked over to the knocked out children.

“Well, no worries. We’ll need to do that every two weeks, about, with the rate of hair growth considered. Half a sleeping pill every other week won’t cause any harm. Well, protective services might not view it the same way, but I’ve done my research,” He shrugged, “I was growing bored with basic biology, so I moved on to anatomy and medicine more specifically… as a hobby. Even with how busy I’ve been, I still need to relax somehow.”

“Ah yes, learning how to be a doctor. Completely relaxing,” Tohri rolled their eyes, chuckling a bit, “But then, I can’t say that it would make sense for me to expect any differently of you. Although, I must say, I do hope you at least conducted some of that research by watching hospital dramas on tv. Don’t work yourself to death.”

“Wouldn’t that be something.”

“...Isa?” They questioned, turning around to look at him, suddenly worried once again. He’d never said anything like that before, never. Even in the worst moments, when he spoke of how hopeless he was, or when he’d come home injured by Asuka.

“Well, you needn’t worry about that,” He shrugged again, “After all. I have responsibilities. I couldn’t just leave Miru and Kaku to the wayside like that. Nor could I have squandered the chance to meet you once again. And now, it seems, it would just be an absolute dick move for me to leave you behind. So, no. I’m just committed enough to keeping myself alive. If I wasn’t, well, I’d have turned my back on Asuka a long time ago.”

“Don’t frighten me like that, Isa!” They snapped, holding a hand to their chest in shock, “Why, the idea of never seeing you again was a horrible enough notion when I knew you were still out there! If you died, then, I just don’t know what I’d do with myself!” Their tone suddenly turned much more grim, “That’s… that’s really your situation.”

“What do you mean?” He questioned.

“It never really hit me before. That… you can’t be comfortable. That even the slightest defiance against your family puts you at risk of being killed, that you.. Cannot be free, to be yourself in any propensity whatsoever. How utterly trapped you are. I’ve had to deal with people like that of course, but always from a distance. My own family is quite supportive…”

“It’s hard to grasp the gravity of something like this. The fear I experience is common, yes, but politicians also exist in another world entirely. Others like me can be afraid that honesty could have them killed, but nobody else would fear that their family would track them down to kill them in the event they ran away. Most families who’d kill a child for breaking their expectations would just be glad for the disappearance…”

“Isa,” Tohri stated with a peculiar intensity, “I swear on my life. I’ve caused you pain in the past… and I must remedy that. Someday, somehow, I will find a way for you to be happy. Truly happy, and safe. It may take decades. We may be old and withered and… frankly incredibly awful in appearance by the time I do, but I will. If I fail, then you have full permission to spend our shared eternity in Hell kicking me in the head.”

“That was sweet,” He responded blankly, “Well, except for that last bit. I can’t argue necessarily, that we won’t both go to Hell, but kicking you in the head is a rather specific and odd eternal punishment to give somebody for failing to fulfill a promise. I can imagine, also, that if we were to have a chance at interaction in Hell I would prefer to spend it other ways than kicking you. But, I suppose it is the thought that counts.”

:”I am serious, you know.”

“Of course. When are you not?”


	12. Chapter 12

“Doctor Kawara!” A sharp and familiar voice snapped, pulling the researcher out of his focused cooing at the children who were in a brilliantly constructed playpen put into the office of the facility’s supervisor. That voice of course, belonged to said supervisor, “Visiting is quite fine. However, you’ve been here twenty minutes. If you are going to waste your time in my office cooing at my children, why not just take the vacation time to be with _your family_?”

 

“Ahh… sorry, Isa! I can still call you Isa, right? That’s how I knew you before, after all! Before you became a girl again and took over the facility and all th-” He was cut off by Isa pressing a hand over his mouth and glaring.

 

“No. To you, it is Utsurou Ichijou. To everyone in the facility, I am not and never was Isa Souma. This includes you, Sir,” Isa’s voice was firm and unwavering as he told off his… ex-affair? “Isa Souma is a scientifically minded young man who was tricked into losing his virginity, barely into adulthood, with a man who would drop him to the wayside as soon as he was sick of him. Meanwhile, I, Utsurou Ichijou, have never met you before in my life. I am a person of politics and nothing else, who’s taken over Takaba Labs as part of my family’s agenda, and have every intent of taking things slow should I be in a relationship.”

 

“Wow. You’re no fun anymore!” Ryuuji frowned as he got to his feet and grabbed the laptop bag he’d haphazardly dropped for the purpose of interacting with Miru and Kaku, who were actually altogether far too old for the sort of interaction that this estranged father of theirs had been giving them. They were still children, yes, but baby talk was worthless to them and Isa was pretty sure he’d actually spotted them looking, for once in their rambunctious lives, bored.

 

“I never intended to be fun. Neither did Isa Souma. Now, if you stay here, I’ll only continue being bitter, and you’ll need to listen to me berating you. Isn’t that unfortunate? But, an easily avoided outcome, if you were to simply… leave,” Isa offered, lifting a pen and pointing towards the door with eyebrows raised. Ryuuji frowned, and sighed melodramatically, but followed the order he’d been given to leave and get back to work.

 

Likewise, without such a distraction, Isa returned to his own papers. They were generally meaningless things that he was supposed to sign. Or, well, meaningless to him. They were of course important to the facility in some way or another, but he wasn’t able to be involved in the interesting parts. Technically, he wasn’t even supposed to read the grant requests or lab reports; only sign and mail or file them. It was as if he was a secretary, but with a fancy title and a necessity to authorize every document with his higher-up signature.

 

Altogether, this job was absolutely uninteresting. Isa would much prefer to be working in the lab once more, but that was strictly prohibited and he’d come to terms with the fact that he wasn’t going to do the sort of things he’d enjoy. Yes, Tohri had promised this to be a temporary problem, but he seriously doubted that Tohri Nishikikouji could actually follow through on a promise like that; although they’d only made it after they clearly understood the gravity of the situation, there was still the fact that Tohri didn’t really have a habit of thinking ahead.

 

It only took Isa another twenty minutes to finish up everything on his desk. In his thoughts, he’d gone into autopilot on signing off the documents. That left him a bit of extra time, he supposed, so he may as well brace himself. He took a few deep breaths before opening his laptop and sending an email to his mother to work on planning for his upcoming campaign. He was going to run for the house of representatives, like she’d established a while back. The timing of the childrens’ birth, and his slowness in taking to political matters, had delayed the start of the campaign quite a bit, but there was no way he’d be getting out of it this election season.

 

The email he sent was both short and simple, just a request to discuss the campaign, but the response he got was much, much longer; however, three reads through it allowed him to boil it down into something just as short. He was to allow Asuka to handle everything. Campaign videos, scheduling things, even writing the speeches would belong to her, although he still needed general competence in order to answer questions he may be asked during the events. She also noted that election season was in two weeks, and if he wanted any time off at all, he’d have to take it quickly. Now, in fact.

 

It had been four months since Tohri had moved back in, and in that effort, become Isa’s datefriend. For the entire past month of that, they’d been going on and on about how they seriously wanted Isa to meet their family, because they’d complained so much about him then subsequently gushed when the reason for complaints was gone. The idea of meeting somebody else’s family when his own was so horrible was intimidating to Isa, but apparently, Tohri’s family was actually worthy of being called that.

 

Plus, they did know him as Tohri’s boyfriend. If he was to go to visit them, it might be enough validation to keep him going in slightly less misery when he needed to launch full-force into the life of a political candidate, after all. And he doubted that he’d really get the chance to again, unless he somehow both lost the election and didn’t get murdered for doing so.

 

That was something to think about another time. For now, it did seem best to see if he could… meet the Nishikikoujis in this brief period of relative freedom he’d have before being thrown into a world that would completely decimate his spoons every day. He really wasn’t looking forward to campaigning, but of course, it was the only way to preserve his life. Even if it did cross his mind to give up on that, he couldn’t. As he’d told Tohri, he couldn’t just leave his children behind. That was really all that truly kept him there; even to this day, even with support in his life once more, that couldn’t remedy his hopelessness.

 

Ah, but that was something he’d determined about his nature long ago. As long as there was something that he felt he owed somebody, he simply couldn’t die. Regardless of his emotions, if he had obligations, it wasn’t something that he could do. He was sure this would hold true throughout all time, and he could only hope that by the time Miru and Kaku were old enough not to need him anymore, that he’d have found a way to claw himself out of this depression.

 

Regardless, he stood up and picked the rapscallions out of the play enclosure, setting them down again almost immediately. Lifting them was quite a difficult task, and continuing to carry them was just impossible. Luckily, he also had child leashes. As ridiculous as it might be to put a child on a leash, with kids like Miru and Kaku it was a necessity, especially in a building like this. He would really rather they didn’t run off into some chemistry lab and become strange mutated creatures.

 

That would be simply ridiculous. Mutants obsessed with Christmas? Who ever heard of such a thing? He shook his head and chuckled a bit at the thought, earning himself an odd look from a passing… coworker. Well, he wasn’t sure what word to use given that he and the scientists at work here were clearly not on the same plane of function; he was technically above them and functionally below them, which unfortunately, did not even out. However, seeing as he was this employee’s superior, an odd look was the only disrespect he’d need to deal with.

 

Fine enough, he supposed, if he hadn’t been forced to present as a woman; as it was, any rumors which circulated regarding his gender back when he’d worked here himself were the worst things had ever gotten, excluding Ryuuji Kawara’s behavior towards him, so now to have everyone knowing him this way was really no better. However, there was nothing he could do about it. In any case, he found Tohri who was luckily in their office rather than in the engineering labs, so they could speak privately.

 

Isa walked in and closed the door behind himself before saying a word, “Tohri, I have something to ask of you.”

 

“Hm? I’m guessing it isn’t work related, since you shut the door and brought the children along with you as if you weren’t planning to go back to your office later…” They noted, looking Isa over and wrinkling their nose a bit. They tried not to pay too much attention to the way he looked while at work, but on the occasion that they did they were always appalled by how clearly uncomfortable Isa was like this, “So, shoot.”

 

“Campaign season is starting soon. Asuka has made it entirely clear that in two weeks time, when my campaign truly launches, I will have no free time between that and my work here as supervisor. Chances are that workload will continue indefinitely, assuming that I win the election…” He frowned, looking away, “And I would rather not think of the options if I was to lose…”

 

“Merry Christmas…” Miru mumbled, roughly translating to ‘Daddy’s dead meat’.

 

“...Yes, Miru, I suppose that’s correct,” Isa hesitated, giving the child an odd look.

 

“Wherever did he learn to say… or, well, imply through Merry Christmas, something like that?” Tohri questioned, squinting at Miru as well. In their time with Isa again, they’d quickly picked up on how those season’s greetings translated into actual statements.

 

“I haven’t the faintest clue. Perhaps from you? I certainly wouldn’t offer such a crude description on death,” Isa shrugged, “In any case, that’s not important right now. What is important is that I’d like to spend my remaining sliver of free time with you. In fact, I think that it’s about time that I relented to meet your family…”

 

“Are you serious?” Tohri questioned, standing up and pushing their hands against their desk, “I thought for certain that you would never want to meet them! Didn’t you once say that one Nishikikouji is far more than enough? Or have you forgotten?”

 

“My opinion still holds. However, I really would prefer not to listen to you complain that you’ve met my horrible family and I haven’t met your great one for the entire duration of my campaign. It would simply add annoyance to torture,” He explained, leaning back against the door, “Regardless, it can’t be so bad. They’ll wear me out, but if they really are as good as you say, then I can handle that. And besides, at least it will be with you. You’ll be seeing far less of me once the campaign begins… Are you willing to babysit these two in that time, by the way?”

 

“Yes, of course. Not a problem,” Tohri nodded, then thought through the rest of what Isa said, “Well, I’m still not entirely sure, but I’m beginning to think you actually just said something vaguely romantic? Saying that you wish to spend your only remaining freedom, with me? Well, that’s something! I think that we absolutely should do this,” They smiled at Isa as they pulled out their phone and dialed a number, “Hello, mother? Would it be all right if my boyfriend and his children, and of course, myself, were to come visit for two weeks? Oh no, we couldn’t stay longer than that. Campaign season. I’ve ranted at you about this before. We’ll get the first plane off the island, then! Thanks so much! Love you!” He hung up the phone then looked back to Isa, “That was your intention, yes?”

 

“Of course,” He nodded, “I suppose that it’s fine with her, given she offered that we stay for even longer? That’s foolish of her. For all she knows, she could end up hating me.”

 

“She won’t hate you,” Tohri jumped up, kneeling on their desk and grabbing the sides of Isa’s arms, “I know this! Even when I was convinced that I hated you, she had her doubts! I told her all about you when I was first falling in love with you, so even when I was complaining about how heartless and rude you were to me she had her doubts that the situation was really as I told her! Er… Perhaps, I should have listened to her when she said those things… It was truly painful for me, you know! None of my family supported my unjustified bitterness towards you!”

 

“I’m sorry?” Isa wasn’t sure what to say, and so just offered up a confused apology instead, “In any case, we should get going. We’ll stop at the apartment to pack, then head straight out?” He questioned as he sent a text to his own mother, noting that he’d be going on vacation during those two weeks before the campaign started, and that she had permission to track him down if he wasn’t back in time; the only way to keep her from putting out surveillance on him for the entirety of the trip.

 

“Yes, that sounds like a plan,” Tohri nodded as they put their laptop back in its far-too-fashionable bag and climbed off of the desk they’d been perched on, standing up to their full height and then some. Heels for the giant again, of course, making them tower over their short boyfriend and the two children.

 

Isa and Tohri left the building together; it wasn’t suspicious to do so, seeing as it was no secret among the facility that they were roommates, and no secret to anybody who wanted it to be true that the two of them had some level of romance between them. Luckily for Isa, it wasn’t enough so that the notoriously homophobic Asuka Ichijou would make the connection, even with her prior suspicions towards Tohri. In the current situation, she could easily just brush them off as a friend helping with the twins. Entertaining, wasn’t it, that their relationship would cause issues for _that_ reason when in truth, neither party in the relationship could very well be considered a lesbian.

 

“Now…” Tohri noted as they arrived back at the apartment and immediately began packing, “You can’t pack bags very well, right? So I will pack for you,” They decided, then went running off throughout the apartment, returning eventually with an armful of the nice clothes they’d gone out with Isa to get once, as well as his binder, “Now, it’s probably not a good idea to bind on the plane, due to potential surveillance from your parents as long as we are on this island...” They noted, stuffing these items into a suitcase, “However, when we are with my family, you most certainly can. Therefore, you can dress nicely while there, something which my brother at the very least will appreciate, that my boyfriend does have a sense of style…”

 

“It’s not much of one,” Isa shrugged, leaning back against the wall by the door, “And I’d never dress that way if not for your influence…”

 

“Well, yes, if not for me then you’d still be wearing loose-fitting sweats and pajamas every day, but that’s a simple matter of confidence. Once moving past that hurdle you do at least have a sense of what will look nice, and what will look nice on you. The scholarly look is a fitting one! However, my brother may insist you try some of his modern stylings on, of course, though they’ll be dreadfully unsuited to you, you may look nice in them regardless…” They went on as they finished that suitcase and moved on to another, “Miru, Kaku, you’re spry youths, could you be dears and go pack your own bags?”

 

“Merry!” Miru nodded and dashed off.

 

“Christmas!” Kaku did similarly, and in seconds there was actual silence in the room, a harsh contrast to before; both Tohri and Isa had simply gotten used to the twins’ habit of humming Christmas carols everywhere they went, so the lack of background noise was unfamiliar. Moreso to Isa than to Tohri, given that he was the one who had to spend all day around them at work.

 

“There we go,” Tohri nodded, finishing up the zipper on their own suitcase, “Why, I may have set a record on my packing time…”

 

“I doubt it,” Isa shrugged, chuckling a bit as he gave Tohri an amused look, “I’d say your quickest packing was most likely when Uzune kicked you out of your dorm. Despite you dumping it all on my table, I could tell you went quite fast when putting that bag together… even for how much you fit into it.”

 

“Were you actually paying that much attention to me, even then?” Tohri asked, leaning over a bit with a hand on their collarbone, “Why, Isa! I never would have thought it! Even on the very first day that we met in person, you cared enough to observe me…”

 

“Or I was freaked out enough to be watching you for any sign of being dangerous to me,” Isa shot back, picking at his nails, “We’ve been over this already. In no way did I fall in love quickly, or even warm up to you platonically particularly fast. I’m still unsure what compelled me to allow you to stay that day…”

 

“Perhaps you were touched by my extremes?” Tohri offered, with an overdramatic bow, “I of course mean the contrast between my being fantastic and the amount of compassion and gentleness I showed you that day!”

 

“I couldn’t care less about how fantastic you were, or anything like that. Really, you were obnoxious… but, you did show me a peculiar kindness. Perhaps it was selfish of me, but I suppose I let you stay because I wished to allow your coddling on some level,” He crossed his arms and looked up at the ceiling, “Not to delve too deep into my own psyche, but you know as well as I that before we met I only received the faintest scraps of affection in my life, and that was only when Asuka wished to use it to manipulate me.”

 

“Hm,” Tohri nodded, stepping closer to Isa and grabbing his hands like in a shoujo anime, “Well, then it’s all for the better that you and I met, isn’t it? I get to show kindnesses that I rarely have the opportunity to, and you get to experience those kindnesses!” They smile at him, “We really could have done without that whole incident, but… well, who am I to say you weren’t being an oblivious, dumb child in regards to Kawara when I was even worse a few years prior? And some good did come of it!”

 

“Yes,” Isa looked away, but did seem to be smiling, just the ghost of one, “Miru and Kaku…”

 

“Right!” Tohri nodded, letting go of Isa’s hands to stand up straight, “Great children. I was fully prepared to be a parent when I was a teenager, after all! It was both a relief and a disappointment, when things went wrong… So now I can exercise all of that old preparedness!”

 

“Yes, it does seems that all of that worked out okay, didn’t it?” Isa asked, leaning back against the wall and sighing, “And for that matter, I would be dead right now if not for Miru and Kaku. When Asuka called, after you left… it was to tell me that she was about to have me killed. My pregnancy was the only thing that made her give me a chance.”

 

“Things fell into place…” Tohri noted, staring up at the ceiling, “Except for her, and your father. The Ichijous are still… a problem.”

 

“Well, not everything can be solved of course,” Isa shrugged, then looked up as Miru and Kaku returned to the room with overstuffed backpacks, “Ah, there you are. Ready to go?”

 

“Merry!” Kaku confirmed.

 

“Christmas?” Miru asked, which translated to something along the lines of ‘I’m still not quite clear on where we are going’.

 

“Oh, that’s right, our conversation was a bit hard to follow,” Tohri noted, then simplified it for the children, “We’re going to see my mother! Also, potentially my sister and my brother!”

 

“Merry Christmas?” They questioned in unison, the translation this time being ‘Grandmother?’

 

“No, no,” Tohri laughed, waving it off through their chuckles, “Not technically, anyway! You aren’t really related to me, I’m just dating your father.”

 

“Merry,” Miru protested and it was something along the lines of ‘But you’re an awful lot like a parent’.

 

“Yes, well, I’m simply not,” They explained, shaking their head, “But I do appreciate you saying so! In any case, we should get going, yes?” They questioned, and Isa nodded in agreement. Tohri grabbed the child leashes that were trailing on the ground and had the children come along; Miru and Kaku were great kids, yes, but no toddler should be trusted when travelling, let alone ones this energetic.

 

Luckily, the trip was uneventful. The small, understaffed airport for the island was hardly busy, and there were only a few other members of staff living on the island who were boarding this plane to Tokyo; once there, transfers would be made. It was going to take off in about twenty minutes, so there was some downtime. Buy a pretzel from the airport’s single shop? Why not. The children certainly appreciated it when Tohri asked for the red and green colored salts, and soon enough the group was all seated in the waiting area.

 

Fifteen minutes before boarding, Isa’s phone rang. He set down the pretzel he was eating himself (a cinnamon one) and looked at the caller ID. Ryuuji. Well, as much as he was loathe to, it was probably important that he answer this call, “Yes, Doctor Kawara?”

 

“Is- I mean, Utsurou! I mean, Ichijou! I’m requesting permission to make an address to the facility employees!” His franctic voice came through the speaker, “You see! It has come to my attention that one of the departments was neglectful in informing its new recruits of our ethics policy, or lack thereof! I would like to remind our employees why our location is what it is, is that acceptable?”

 

“Yes,” Isa answered, flatly, “Just make sure to get somebody to stream it to my phone so I can tell you to stop if you say something dumb.”

 

“Not an issue!” Ryuuji was so loud the phone speaker crackled, then he hung up. Isa sighed, and opened the streaming app on his phone, motioning for Tohri to come over and watch too. It was up within five minutes.

 

“I would like to tell you all something! Something very interesting that you probably haven’t actually heard before!” Ryuuji stood there, making his announcement, and held up a piece of paper, “I have here, a statement made by the founder of this scientific program! It should be our motto, except it’s too long to be a motto!” He cleared his throat, “All right, here it is!”

 

“When you step onto this island, note that you are, first and foremost, an employee of Takaba Labs. It doesn’t matter what your role is, whether you are simply working at the restaurant or in the biology division; you work for us, and therefore, you must do away with the idea of morality. Takaba Labs was created as a place to display scientific prowess and progress without limitations. You cannot allow your consciousness to inhibit your intelligence. In a place like Takaba, we would perform human experimentation if we only had the humans to experiment on. It is not a place for the squeamish, for the hesitant, or for any who would feel guilt over these actions done in the name of science.”

 

And of course, the stream cut out there. Was that really all that Ryuuji had to say? Well, luckily enough. If he kept talking he would probably find some way to weaken the words he’d just read. Isa nodded, then turned off his phone and slipped it into his pocket, “Surprisingly competent. He read it well,” He stood up, “And made a fitting decision in deciding to read that rather than to explain on his own.”

 

“I’d never heard that…” Tohri noted, standing up as well and walking towards the plane, as it had begun boarding. They made sure to drag Miru and Kaku along, who were spaced out completely in playing some strange Christmas game on their GBAs, “I actually had no idea that Takaba not only meant to operate without ethics, but against them. Not that I have any issue, but it is interesting. Perhaps the founder was some sort of mad scientist…”

 

“Well, his name has been lost to time, but his message remains,” Isa shrugged, taking the window seat. Tohri sat next to him and let Miru and Kaku sit across the aisle, “Perhaps we’ll lose some employees soon, after they heard that… Nonetheless, that’s fine. Only truly great scientists will put progress over morals… if they wouldn’t do that, we don’t need them anyhow.”

 

“So you would consider yourself to be a truly great scientist?” Tohri teased, elbowing their boyfriend who just smirked back at them.

 

“Well, yes, and you too,” He noted, and Tohri nearly leaned down to kiss him quickly, but thought better of it. That could wait until they were out of the potential Ichijou surveillance, after all.

 

-  
Miru and Kaku remained hyperfixated on their Christmas game right up until the taxi from the airport arrived at Tohri’s apartment building, which was far better than them being rambunctious for any portion of the trip, excluding the fact that the volume was way too high on the gameboys, thus filling all forms of travel with an alternation of sweet remixes of Jingle Bells, Let it Snow, and Dance of the Sugarplum Fairy. In any case, sweet remixes were better than inane humming.

 

Once getting out of the taxi, Tohri grabbed the bags (excluding Miru and Kaku’s, which were being worn) and led the way into the building. Isa had the childrens’ child leashes, just to get them inside at least, and followed after as swiftly as he could manage to once paying the cab driver.

As soon as the odd collection stepped into the lobby, they were greeted. And by greeted I mean, a girl turned around, noticed the group, then literally let out an ear-splitting squeal before running over and hugging Tohri, “Tohri! Tohri, you’re back! Nobody said you were visiting! Oh my gosh! Does Mom know?”

“Of course Mom knows, do you honestly believe I would ever make the mistake of a surprise visit home?” Tohri questioned, hugging her back and rolling their eyes, “I did that _once_ , Kaede, and none of you will allow me to hear the end of it...”

 

“DUH!” She let go of them and stuck her hands on her hips, “Obviously, you can’t just show up like that! Geez! When you aren’t here we all just eat microwave food, and we never clean the house even when you do warn us... we had no way to impress the precious youngest Nishikikouji! It was horrible!”

“Horrible for you? I’m the one who had to wait in the hallway until you went grocery shopping,” Tohri sighed, then stepped to the side and made an overexaggerated gesture towards the other three, “In any case, Kaede, these are our guests!”

“Oh. Oh my GOSH,” She dropped her hands to her sides, then closed the distance between herself and Isa in a matter of mere milliseconds, grabbing his cheeks, “You! You’re Tohri’s boyfriend, right? Isa Souma? I’ve heard SO much about you!”

“...You work in a business?” Isa flatlined, staring right back at her, his voice sounding a bit odd due to her grip on his cheeks.

“Absolutely!” She nodded with a wild enthusiasm, then released Isa’s face to stand up straight. God, she was even taller than Tohri. They were wearing those atrociously tall converse today, but she wasn’t in heels either, so it was a fairly accurate assessment of their heights, “I have a really good work ethic!”

“I suppose that’s one way of looking at your optimism,” Isa shrugged, looking her over. At least she was dressed sensibly, although the pigtails in her hair really didn’t fit the image she was dressed for.

“Ohh, you’re adorable!” She squealed, patting Isa’s head before crouching down drastically to investigate the children, “And these little devils must be Miru and Kaku!”

“Merry Christmas!” They both protested against being called devils.

“...You too,” She responded before standing up again and turning back to Tohri, “Oh, Tohriiii! Guess what? GUESS!”

“You have some sort of surprise for me?” Tohri questioned, stepping a bit closer to her, “Well, that just doesn’t make sense. I’m usually the one surprising you with things. Like brilliantly crafted metal pheasants.”

“Oh, it’s nothing like that, don’t worry! You can hold your monopoly over welded sculpture surprise gifts!” She shook her head, grinning, “The surprise is that, Dad’s going to get home while you’re here! His work abroad got cut short!”

“OH my God!” Tohri clapped their hands, grinning back at their sister, “That’s spectacular! Simply dazzling! He and Isa will be able to meet! Oh, but wait. Isn’t fathers meeting boyfriends usually a bad idea...?”

“Well, you’re only half a daughter, so I think he can legally only half-threaten your boyfriend?” Kaede pondered, tapping her foot and looking up at the ceiling, “I guess we’ll burn that bridge when we get to it! Come on, all of you! Mom’s home right now, and so is Hinata!”

“We had perfect timing, so it seems,” Tohri noted, following Kaede to the elevator and holding the door open button while their shorter-legged arthritic boyfriend caught up with the shorter-legged but overexcited tiny children on leashes.

“You did! Hey, how enthralled can the little buggers get by television?” Kaede asked Isa, rightfully assuming he was the more responsible party in the relationship, “It’d be great if we could all talk in private without, like, being worried about saying something inappropriate for their weird tiny ears...”

“You don’t have much experience with children, do you?” Isa asked, looking up at her.

“None whatsoever! I was away at boarding school when my precious little sibling was as small as tweedle dee and tweedle dum here...” She leaned down and tapped their heads, “They’re cute though! Good babies.”

“They’re not dogs, Kaede,” Tohri frowned, glaring at her with their arms crossed, though the tone of their voice made it obvious they were only teasing her.

“Hey, you’re the one who’s got them on leashes!” She protested, getting to her feet then leaning forward to get up in Tohri’s face, “At least I’m trying!”

“Admittedly, yes, you are,” They nodded, rolling their eyes, “And that is, of course, proof of how much you love your siblings and want them to succeed even if you do not understand their interests, such as men who had strange Christmas children.”

“Precisely! Oh, Tohri, you know me so well!” She giggled, then stepped out of the elevator while it was still in the process of opening, only for Isa to note that she’d walked straight into a living room.

“You never mentioned your family lived in the Penthouse apartment...” Isa noted as he stepped forward as well, and Tohri shrugged, following.

“Ah, well, I suppose it just slipped my mind! I really don’t find it very impressive, it’s Mom and Dad’s funds, plus Kaede and Hinata, it’s only natural that they could afford someplace like this!” Tohri explained as they walked out as well, “Ah, and speaking of Hinata...”

Right as they spoke, a guy dressed in what appeared to be a very well-cut and pressed version of a t-shirt strode out, then froze, staring at the group before his face turned from blank to disdainful, “Oh. You’re back. It’s nice to see you, Tohri.”

“Nice to see you too, Hinata!” They smiled and ran up, giving their brother a tackle-hug which was reciprocated with a blank look. Isa expected, looking at Hinata’s face, that his eyes would be screaming ‘kill me’, but despite the facial expression being one of uncaring, he actually somehow gave off the impression of excitement, “How’s it going!?”

“It’s going just plain horribly, and what about your miserable life?” Hinata questioned, tilting his head, but then his expression broke and he fell over into a fit of chuckles, looking even more joyful than Kaede had been.

“Oh, you joker!” Tohri laughed as well, “Everything’s going swimmingly! Or, well, as swimmingly as things can go at this point in time. I have a boyfriend, who is here!” They turned and pointed at Isa, who just waved awkwardly, “AND a great job, and that boyfriend’s weird Christmas children consider me more of a parent than their other biological one. It’s truly a dazzling life I lead! Oh, excluding the threats put on my boyfriend’s life, but I suppose you can’t win them all.”

Isa couldn’t even say that he cared much that Tohri was oversharing so much. If they were close enough with their family to share this information that easily, well, who was he to complain about the cameraderie? Besides, it was almost entertaining for him to see somebody else suddenly informed about so many aspects of his life that he had to keep hidden from so many various people.

“Ah yes, Isa Souma!” Hinata gave him a warm smile, and a thumbs-up, before turning his attention back to Tohri, “That’s quite the number of statements you just made, kid,” He chuckled, reaching down to adjust Tohri’s hair ornaments. He was even _taller_ than Kaede had been, almost a whole head taller than Tohri, and thus could mess with their hair with ease, “And you still can’t fasten these things properly...”

“Shh, don’t say that in front of Isa!” Tohri complained, stomping the ground a bit, “As far as he’s concerned I know everything! All of the ins and outs and incomprehensible clasps of my wardrobe are mapped out in my mind like a spectacular labyrinth of complications, the answer to which only I know!”

“And that may very well be true, but not when it comes to these hair ornaments,” Hinata sighed, leaving them alone, “There, I fixed them. No wonder you lose them all over the place...”

“W-Well, there’s a reason I only wear the ones which are important to me when you are around to help me with them...” Tohri mumbled and looked away, embarrassed by their older brother’s behavior.

“You think I’m embarrassing you in front of your boyfriend? Just wait until Mom gets ahold of you~!” He chuckled, stepping away and finally truly releasing Tohri, who stepped away and groaned.

“It entirely slipped my mind, that such downsides to this visit would be present!” They shook their head, turning to face a wall before leaning against it as footsteps signalled the approach of their mother, who was definitely the tallest one of all. Only a bit taller than Hinata, but enough to be noticable.

“Oh, you’re here!” She seemed almost mild with this greeting, but then she joined the party of grinning family members, “I’m so glad that I finally get to meet my future son-in-law!!”


End file.
